柠檬の味道

19 oct 2010 marks the first.

2010-10-20T01:51:00.002+08:00

Yepp, its sure the first. :)

I'm really happy today.
as in real happy, not total satisfaction from all the good things that could happen though.

basically, i earned back a friend, i found out something that was bugging me a few days,
and ~ :)

But there is still a lot of unsettled things,
and i don't mean admin work and sorts.
its all human relationships.

i think:
-i gain a hater
-i receiving more dislike from a good friend
-im still not settled with *milan*
-and i want to know who " " is. haha

kinda stupid to be posting on blog, and leaving so much
empty spaces to let imaginations run wild.
but well, who knows who's reading my blog yeah?

i came across something lately.
What's your opinion?

The person you likes, cheats on you before you start a relationship.
What will your reaction be?

-loves :) nights all!

starting over

2010-10-05T02:37:00.002+08:00

So much for being a sloth today.
I finished season 4 charm
now at season 5, 9th epi.
pretty fast eh?

i feel like changing a hairstyle
eh eh eh! no more bleaching
my hair can't take it haha!
wanna cut it short and dye it reddish black.
you know like those layered shoulder length look.
though thick hair is like the "IN" thing now.

removed my french nails,
and replaced with something quite ugly.
i think im removing it tmr, change it to something simple.
im lazy now.

Hadnt really been into stretching lately.
im paranoid by my unknown aches.
im also feeling a little guilt.
not little, maybe a lot. lols

Somehow these will get over soon
yea it will.
and im realizing something odd from myself.
whatever it is.
im going to bed.

nights all :)

..

2010-10-04T00:06:00.002+08:00

today was fun,
but in some way i was restricted.
bound by my own thoughts,
in anyway, shouldnt have went.

Im freaking screwed up now.
i swear the alcohol from the drinking game wasnt the cost.
im not drunk.
i just feel very sick in within.

nonetheless, i'll be probably taking another shot later.
im crying, yet again.
i hate this.
i hate it when people don't listen to me.

im just sleeping with tears tonight again.
i don't feel like sharing to anyone.
i don't understand myself,
let alone people who will understand while listening to me.

what ever, im just a freaking emo kid.
nights all..

i think im going mia again.

TABOO

2010-09-30T01:00:00.002+08:00

damn! you're reading right!
i know! when i do updates, its a bad thing
because the fun thing will be at kuro-yuumi.blogspot.com

I totally did like 2 taboo things that i'll never imagine myself doing.
I never would imagined myself going on a date,
I'll never imagine myself taking alcohol when im out.

Guess what?
HEY i know what you;re thinking of, im not attached for goodness sake.
im not ready -_-~

ok, i went out with someone.
i totally didnt know he treat it as a date.
i thought.. it was purely. genuinely. an interest.
i sound like an ass now.

then after that, i went out with a senior and his friend
at old school timbre for a drink
omg DRINK outside. HAHA!
it wasnt strong, so its okay. :)
hey! should try one day, the pizza is niceee :)

then again, i've been thinking a lot of crazy stuff.
i think im getting indecisive again.
by enjoying things that are happening,
i was ignoring the side that i need to deal with.
i think, someday i need to get all of these out of my chest.
its really burning inside.

but i think ppl will just slap me for it.
i feel like an ass now. haha >.>

nights all :)

dont call my name

2010-09-11T02:03:00.003+08:00

I'm back from a day of dance (Replay - Shinee)
and dinner with desmond and shimin.
pretty nice to walk around the marina coast bay or whatever its called haha!
love the live band at the hotel there,
inspires me so much to learn keyboard.

We were talking about money matters
and here comes all my WANTS.
saw that? not a NEED.
well, i really is in love with the candy series lenses
because they are so paranoia dolls like!
We could totally make a shoot on that. (Y)

alienation photography ,
which i prefer not going after it.
so it made me really want to have a ST600 samsung
because of the totally awesome front display!
save me the trouble of always taking in front of a reflective surface.
I'm like a in built photographer and self model.
except i don't think im pretty or what LOL!

can't wait for ganguro shoot!
HEY where to FIND BROWN 2 WAY CAKE ><><

-with love,
lemon <3

off with the hints
i prefer to play mysterious
thats your kind of play
ain't it?

hearts

2010-09-09T00:43:00.000+08:00

i'm so excited about the styling we're about to do.
can't wait till we get the things ready.
some body! tell me where i can get really dark coloured 2 way cake!
or foundation.
just not mud :X haha!

<3

and the vk shoot. ahhh net idea. HAHA

nights all :)

2010-09-07T01:11:00.002+08:00

attachment was god damn lousy today.
i swear im really exhausted from all it.

and also. year 1 will be year 1. haha
they just, really get me into a lot of troubles.
can't blame right. -_-
i hope i wasn't like that.
and the new teacher, she really gives me the feeling of
another teacher *coughs*

i saw this damn nice contacts lenses
so many colours
i want all.
ROFL.
cant possibly. :X
nvm, prioritise, and slowly collect haha!
indeed, shopping cures depression
but the poo poo pants just got me more depressed.

anyway, i think im really going to work soon
as much as i am reluctant to.
and as much as i want to.
because, it gives me cash income.
i feel the need for it really.
my parents are being more heck about my meals.
i cant just stay at home and starve.
my stomach will stick to my back. gosh.

im so tired, im going to sleep
say hi to 10 more hours,
and hi to holidays
to all who have papers tomorrow
gambatteh! akiramenai!
chuus <3

when all that is you have to say
you're really heartless
so i really didn't have an impact in you?
you totally crushed my dear mood
i hope sleep cures depression too

-

2010-08-31T21:50:00.001+08:00

I feel like crying.

endless story

2010-08-31T01:52:00.002+08:00

Grandma was still not recovering
therefore the MIA-ing at msn and blog and fb.
at least i could tweet a little at the hospital.

I havent had the feeling to study
i heard there is a lot for the thursday one.
i guess after attachment tmr, im going to be super tired.
and also i'll just clear off all the temptation i might have
and chiong all the way to friday.
can't wait for this weekend!

i guess now, with ____ im feeling happy and sort
but i can't feel not guilty towards _____
can't say its like a spoiler or what.
well, im just afraid of the day that'll come
where we will fall off.
now we have ghost in our heart, LOL.
this is so bad -_-~

haii. time to sleep.
approximately 6 hours of sleep
10 hours of attachment (oh shit, i just forgotten about the 1 hour break)
and then maybe like 5-6 hours of self entertainment.
are you counting the hours? yeah! 22 hours O_Oll
i thought i neede 8 hours of sleep haha!

and then the 48hours and above of studying awaits me.
gambatteh neh.

Oh ya
if you're interested in the seirensei, please tell me
so i can send you the rsvp linkie
its all about gakuen matsuri
you know like schol festival for japanese
haunted mansion, maid cafe
and all the food selling.
can't wait!

when i see your face

2010-08-27T01:38:00.002+08:00

I read the lyrics of the song on your wall
Can't help but to think of the times
and the things we used to talk about.
You sure remember that that picture
used to makes me laugh in horror

I remember you sang this song
but i didnt take note about the lyrics
it just seems like its describing what
you were feeling back then.
the random game, hah.

Honestly, a lot of people think that
i should just ignore you
but i just know you are feeling horrible
but i, don't know what to do

I think i'm pretty set and know what i can do
I'm sure it'll change everything
but at least if it relieves you a little
just after that
I can be a little mean
no
i can be mean. i can.
karma already befalls me.
i don't really care i guess.

*self hypnotise*
no i don't care, i don't care.

-can't you, be a little more like them?-
-but maybe you're not them, that's why i'm determined-
-determined, to be waiting here aimlessly-

=-=

2010-08-26T01:46:00.001+08:00

i need some kind of memory loss accidents
just like the one i had around 3-4 years ago.
maybe i can live life happier like that.

My live's is a mask.
only a few manage to unveil it.
and see my true self.
true self my shit.
so horrible feeling now.

exposed

2010-08-26T01:32:00.003+08:00

To a certain point of time
people exposes their ugliness
that they have been trying to hide for long
especially when to the point where
certain circumstances have forced it out of them
well, i've seen much, but i think this is the worse.

The worse kind of feeling when the truth is already out
and you can't say it.
I really really, hate and dislike, to hurt someone.
i hate being a bitch.
i hate it when i have to think for you or give you false hope(which i dunno if i have).
because it ain't the right thing
and you'll just fall deeper, and get hurt even more in the end.
I could have end everything now.
but, what about your side.
it'll be horrible for you no?

I don't want to lose a friend like you.
but i guess, those acts of yours,
its not an act of a friend.
i realised it too late.
i don't deserve such treatments.

And. do you know?
you're selfish to an extent too.
you don't think of how i feel.
its not just on my side.
because you also think that its not normal now.
its not normal for me, i know it myself.
i feel horrible for all those lies.
you know what keeps me going?
to live in denial.

maybe i wasnt that girl you were looking for.
you just find some kind of thrill and essence from it.
you don't speak sincerely too.
you've said before "beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder"
so what makes it fair to describe me so perfectly?
i'm not.

i'm just contradicting myself.
because i would know that if i would tell anyone.
they would have been scolding me and force me to settle these things.
i should, shouldnt i?
i think blog just serves me a platform to complain.
if this gets out to him, god knows what he'll do.
maybe i'll just get this privated again.

-neh, if i posed as any kind of attraction to you, can't you just take me away-

-_-

2010-08-23T03:57:00.002+08:00

200th post. i know its random, but its just my thoughts here im putting.

I know all these things that i've been doing
are making you so sleepless and stuff
i'm really sorry and somehow i get a little backen off from it
maybe its just that im secretly thinking that
i don't want to be tied down by a person
that i don't really know much

You don't have to give up your happiness
to make me happy.
because i know it hurts deep inside you.
maybe its time for you to look for your own happiness
and move on.
its better for you.
because i don't deserve that priviliege.

and, people who think i blog emo-ly
then, open your eyes big.
these are my thoughts, this is a public space
and this IS MY SPACE.
its how i type and exposes my thoughts.
if this turns you off,
why are you even reading up to this point?
and, im not like a happy go lucky person with no worries
im sure everyone does have their worries
if they don't, then congratulations.
good night -_-

natsu matsuri

2010-08-23T03:45:00.002+08:00

been having fun lately for meeting up with nana
to get her yukata
and the epic moments before the natsu matsuri
that was some experience to have.
try wearing a yukata and board the mrt (Y) haha!
and a woman FAILED to explain to her child that we're"japanese"
she said we were koreans. hmm.

we got to play games during natsu matsuri
was looking out for the balloon yoyo and the fishing,
but only the yoyo was available
my the other disappointment was the candy apple
which really did sold out fast :/
I wanted to join bon odori,
but it was rather wet at the grounds
and i wouldnt want to go alone there either. haha!
the platforms for the stage should be higher though.

felt rather guilty though.
i really DID though that someone did asked nonie.
should have asked right? :/
i bet she felt really bad when we left her out. sorry!
and today we went over to have korean bbq dinner
initially i thought we will be within the budget.
but when one more person came
food were ordered more, and i swear i was panicking for the cost.
i mean, im prepared to pay more(knowing how ex it would be),
but what about the others?
i honestly thought, the person who highly disrecommend the place
would not have ordered that 2 portion
if she have already known that, they didnt suit her likings.

oh well. i guess i have been really spending too much.
im killed by guilt for not paying the $63 still counting.
im considering whether to tell her about the instructor incident.
but she wouldnt care either.
she wrote an email for saying that she knows we have out reasons,
but she stil wants her money back.
I KNOW. but..
sigh.
.
.
.
i think im going to persuade my mum to pay
because i don't have a bank account (to transfer)
let alone after all these money spend, i don't have money for holidays.
and for that one cert which i am pretty confident to earn at least a silver
why not.
but duh, they said the cert is totally free
and want us to pay $7 more (??????)
free eh.
you know what?
im beginning to think they handle things really very amateur.
see the way they type the emails.
i really dunno what to say.
i just think that, i wasnt fated to join this whole thing
and people just wants to make more obstacles for me to pursue my interest

aside from all these things,
i suddenly felt like taking up ballet classes. LOL!
or maybe piano lessons.
or BETTER hiphop classes
since holidays are coming after exams,
i could at least afford when i start working.
anybody got lobang?

abon festive

2010-08-21T03:06:00.002+08:00

I've been meeting nana jie to hunt around for yukata
you know why?
its for the abon festival, the natsu matsuri
and its in Singapore!

I sure hope it'll not be a disappointment
where i;ve been getting excited over it for a couple of days
i'm going to try out the new yukata which is like dark blue-purple
with red fishes designed.
so much for the feel of the festive eh!
will post the pictures :)

and with tomorrow and sunday,
i would have met nana jie for over 5 days
haha! scary LOL.
nvm, i think its cool to hang around her ;)

I feel kind of restless lately
and cashless. its suck during holidays
because i don't see allowance. -_-.
sigh, and i want to wake up early and sleep late
to fully utilize the full day
but i guess sleep is really needed
i feel so exhausted too.

Annoying stuff happens
but some good stuff too.
i shall just embrace the goodness in life.
sometimes, i guess humans have too to be selfish.
because it protects themselves from getting hurt.
and because selfish people exists to hurt them
what goes around comes around.

i pass by that place today
it kind of reminds me the stupid stuff i did
and it makes me wonders whether
it was just a spitting distance pass you.

good night all :)

!

2010-08-21T03:02:00.000+08:00

i dislike the feeling of losing
and regretting
maybe thats why everytime when i'm about to lose something
i get more anxious and wants to save it
but when i did, i began to see the ugly side of things
thats when i get sick of it all over again.

and, all my posts and statuses
have no business with you
stop asking me because i will just find
some ridiculous excuse to make you believe
and you'll never get to the bottom of it.
you know what?
i think you're just annoying when you always start with
"oh, then what is (status) about" in a soft voice
i think thats annoying.

i think i'm going to use the method
maybe trying to close myself
would stop giving me this kind of trouble
i want peace in my life.

-

2010-08-15T22:39:00.001+08:00

Just wanted to know what is the choice taken.
I'm curious.

and. we talk like strangers.

love

2010-08-15T13:02:00.000+08:00

Being loved is a happy thing.
when truth is out.
Ugliness shows.
Maybe shouldnt be loved at first after all.
Both parties get hurt in the end.

--

2010-07-08T02:39:00.002+08:00

I got a feeling i've told too much to people
but not to the right person
Its rather depressing about the whole matter
guess i have to survive.

furthermore, i don't want to let the person to feel too into guilt
some people think that i should just cry out in front of that person
but wouldn't it like, make it hard for that person? :/
i should be more hard hearted. right? hmm.

i'm looking forward to see what will happen after this sunday
its all going to turn out epic. i think?
hmm.
ahhh everything is so depressing. haha!
nvm, night night all :X

``

2010-07-02T00:31:00.003+08:00

People struggle to continue to live in the place they belong to.
I struggle to find a place i belong to.

You know what? if you were to blame me and fault me for it,
i might have felt better.
but you went and make the other one felt guilty.
indirectly making me feel so vexed by it.
conscious by it.
its not a good thing you know.

I just realised i HAD to keep quiet the whole time through out
its like, anytime you do something, theres someone out there
JUST looking at you. LIke stares.
finding faults, waiting to create more gaga out of it.
Great, people who can't mind your own business
you just successfully affected me.

Fine, i know what is coming for me
After all the things, i'll lose this place of mine.
i know it, you dun have to remind me.
you'll get it back, rest assured.
now you're happy, everyone is backing up for you.
yeah im the bad guy.
the person who cries first wins.

im so vexed geez.
and yet i have to see you and your bf in the bus
like, staring at me from the back.
good la, have backup. you win.
i have no say.

sigh.

~~

2010-06-16T22:46:00.003+08:00

was out with xxxx and xxxxxx for dinner today
i x-ed them out, girls you should know why. haha!
i missed them so much, meeting once in a while IS nostalgic.

what happen when you put girls together,
you GOSSIP. yeah we did. haha!
thought we didn't get to really walk around much?
i think we had our little fill in catching up (:
im sorry, if i tried to direct my topic away.
just didn't wanted to talk about those matters (:

oh yeah, when i was returning home with xxxxxx
there was a girl who played her opera songs so loud.
but it didnt sound like opera. it sounded dark, and scary
like how people use to portray spirits lurking in horror movie?
that was like freaking scary, and to think that technology was so good lately
you didnt know where the sound is coming from. *gasps*
and it was FOLLOWING US AROUND.
i swear, my legs were jelly.
oh ya, not to mention her weird posing arms and fingers...
she must have been!.... ok, i won't judge her :X

i still feel my little confuse and lost here and there
anyway, i'll be gone until sunday. because of camps.
im having a little fight within myself whether to go anot.
i need my holidays, i want to cut my hair, i want to do my nails. LOL
omona! amanda is so hiao~ *blush* ROFL.
no la, people will just simply say that im ah lian.
hey you know? its an OUCH. cuz i dislikes ah lian.

as long as i see you smile, i'll be happy
what if i can't even see your smiles?

i was there, at the place near where you live.
my timing and my intention of going to there
was simply because i hoped that i would see you.
somehow.

iwas looking around, i was making wishes
i was hoping that, anyone that i would have seen
or glanced at, would be you.
why am i looking for you so hard?
cant you just appear before me? ):.
i still have hope, sundown.
but i doubt i would see you,
and i dun have the confident to look nice in front of you
but i do want to see you.
i do want you to fall in love with me.
you're worth it, im willing to.
i'll wait for you. 82 days left.

---

2010-06-15T22:49:00.002+08:00

Im not strong, im not happy go lucky as you see.
I feel that i shouldn't think so much sometimes, but i cant help to.
god knows how many post i have written and hid it as drafts.
its its. all about things im unhappy about.
life, is like that. you aren't satisfied by it.

I wonder what im turning to.
is changing a new me that unsatisfying to people?
i mean, i know that i live for myself, i be who i am.
but i dun even know who i am now.
why is everyone having issues with my attitude?
im just trying, to protect myself.
cant i?

i always said, and felt that. i can't live long
its just a very bad feeling i have.
you know how some people, they are able to see their future.
my future? is a room of darkness, just like how you see when you close your eyes.
i dunno, i really dunno.
so cant i just go for some life-changing stuff once in a while to do crazy things?
i know how much i have missed out for the past 16 years. i know.

you know sometimes, when i walk on the streets.
i think about how you might have walked on it, with whoever i duno.
how about the thousands and millions faces i have seen?
did i ever take a glance of you before?

i hate it how, people get closer to you, when i know you longest.
i should have known about you more,
i hate losing, i really hate losing.
and how she said you're flirting with me?
its been like this for 3 years. whats fucking wrong with her?
so she thinks she like freaking close to you?
come on, shut up.
i dun deserve to be said like this.
i dun give you fucking attitude for you to be spraying acid on me.
and do you know how hard it is, to actually be waiting for you?

i dunno about you just like how you were trying to wait for me
im sorry, i knew you were lonely, but did you know i was lonely as well?
do you know how i feel, when those people come over and confront me?
do you know all the bad things they said about me?
do you.. understand the pain i had to gone through...?
do i not deserve to be loved, and love as well?
you know? i really like you. it hadnt changed for 3 years.
if it did, i would have felt nothing after we separated.
why do i feel worst than the first time?
you understand right?

and where are you now?
who are you hinting again?
what are you trying to do?
cant you tell me? cant?
i guess, i dun deserve to know.
im not someone you can trust. right.
i leave no space in your heart.
even if one day, i go missing, i die
i won't be missed. i won't. probably not you.
you'll just get over with it so fast.
and get another of your love, or someone to share with.
a lvoe that i can never have. the voice of yours i'll never hear.
and the care and love under you,
honestly, i envy those girls who dated with you.

i feel i can do better than them
i can give you the care you wanted.
im not materialistic. because i do give in my all.
neh. what about you? have you ever thought of that?
have you ever tried being confident and says, i'll give you happiness
would you do that extend to work for me?
i did, you can see it. but you didnt liked it.
how did i felt? have you even tried thinking?
be. sensitive.

bastard

2010-04-10T23:58:00.002+08:00

You were interested when I was black-haired, and natural.
You weren't interested when I am bleached-hair and makeups.
From admire, to denial.
So you were one of the guys who are after the looks only.
Oh, what an ass.

Konbawa minna san!
I wonder what i did and ate yesterday that made me fell ill
I woke up at 6 plus today from seemingly gastric pain
and was so nauseous.
I stood in front of the toilet bowl
and frightened my mother. haha!

Was feeling so bad that i sat with my back lying on the cupboard.
My mother passed me a pill, and some warm water and nagged at me. HAHA :X
then when she was off to the market, i almost puked, and i had diarrhea.
Ehh, no "Sh**" you know, i was passing out water. LOL
I was afraid that i got too dehydrated from it that i stopped myself from going toilet.
Another bad thing was, period.
I hope my bed didn't get stained ~_~

I slept like the whole day
Because i was feeling really weak and bad.
Had only a bowl of porridge and some preserved vegs for lunch
More like it was breakfast.
Then after that i was alive for a moment
and went back to sleep at 4 pm.
I thought i could have a rest until 4.30pm then start showering
preparing to go grandma house
But it was really bad, and i was afraid i might vomit in my dad's car
You know how bad my car sickess is, especially weekends(weirdly)
So i slept all the way to 8.30 pm i think?
I know i woke up on a few occasion sweating badly

Imagine the weather, and then, i had my air-con blanket to cover me. LOL
But it was still cold.
Glad the home-made prescription was pretty well
I didnt see a doctor. Only if tmr it gets worst, i might go to one.
My hair was definitely in a really bad condition.
It wasn't MESSY
It was rough, bad curly state and touching it its like.. WIRE =_=
really bad.
But after the shower, it was back to normal
i guess?

ahh, im going to dig out some aimless coincidences. LOL
tata~

2010-04-07T00:39:00.000+08:00

When people called me to not hold on,
I didnt.
I got hurt in the end.

When people told me to hold on,
I held on tightly.
and was badly hurt again.

With these,
should i still hold on?
because in anyway,
i will still get hurt right?

2010-04-07T00:23:00.002+08:00

I thought i was out of the safety zone
weirdly i find it a bit sad
but, lately I think i'm inside it again
now i feel a little scared. haha!

Do you ever had the feeling of someone
trying to intrude into your life so much that
it really annoys you more than your mother's nag?

and also the sad part
reminded me of something someone said long ago
what a complex. ROFL.
not that i'm bhb >.>..
(nevermind, i don't need anyone to know about this)

I had the feeling of re-watching we got married again
eto, it kind of managed to distract my attention away
I've got back my dream fest
which is from bad->freaking!->hilarious
sometimes i really wish to live in dream land instead
but ain't that really living in self denial?

I'm beginning to think its impossible
It happened to me before, and i've overcame it somehow
someone told me to overcome , you have to ( ) again
which is a really... i don't know, i just felt it as an inappropriate method
and also, lately it got me thinking that the someone had motive for saying that.
By seeing this, haters would say god is really fair. haha!

eto . i think i might private my blog again -_-
told you, i remembered my reason for it.
haha! tata~
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
With fate brings opportunities.
With destiny makes couple.

2010-04-03T00:35:00.002+08:00

Yooo! was out with vivian today
i mean yesterday
bugis walking for the whole day
then met one of her friend *winks*
then we went back home eventually. LOL
girl! oovoo soon, you owe me stuff!

im rather tired, but its true i think i had fun
this kind of life i want for holidays instead of rotting
im going for language lesson after the sem start
and also dance maybe . im tempted! ahh!!

i wish my hair will turn back to normal
yikes!

-------------------------------------------------------
when you were having some good dreams
probably
what i dreamt of was you saying
"sorry, i've left"

rong rong ago

2010-03-30T01:15:00.003+08:00

After a period of time
i finally remember why i decided to private my blog
there was a second reason to it. but well..

Watched how to tame a dragon
i seriously hoped to watch the 3D version one
i think it'll be seriously thrilling
well, next time ba, other movies then

Just now managed to surprise my mum
but my original idea was to sing till she wakes up
for that 1 hour i reached home,
i was desperately making noise to make my mum awake
it was tough, i swore. haha!!

I think i might need an earlier rest tonight
My pimples and zits are outbreaking
either its the weather, the makeup, or the.. woman thing! LOL
i think its the latter rofl!

gotta blast!
----------------------------------------------------------------
4 days ain't going to get me giving up
but i just read soemthing,
if a crucial factor is missing from the equation
you can't force it, let it go.
even its so, i can try to prove it right?
please dun take it jokingly.
but i just read something

blog blog

2010-03-28T01:50:00.002+08:00

I'm having super dry eyes for using contacts after a while
Well, i think i have slept too much today that i'm still feeling sleepy
I was up until 4 am last morning. LOL

Today was considered as a rather short day for me
Considering the timing i slept
And 2 hours i woke up i had to get ready to go out
Just found out that my gu-zhang is in hospital
But i didn't brought any identification
So was drinking and playing games entertaining myself in Starbucks
Remember i went to my cousin's wedding dinner
I finally realised the reason for him to be so cold to me
He thought i was my brother's girlfriend...

Tomorrow(or rather today) will be out with Nonie i guess
We're like going to Bugis to get some gifts
For my mum, for you know who, and for my uncle(maybe)
Since they birthday is like one after another
Bye bye $$ :/

Tried out the Liquid Chalk just now
I think its like EPIC WIN! :D
Totally love it, and drawing on the mini black board
Oh- My- God!

I have been writing a short story on my phone
Like typing when i can't fall asleep
Some may think its like... Familiar
Ya, its based on true event. LOL
I'm lazy to transfer it to my lappy
Cuz its like... 17 sms long ? so far~
I don't know how to end it, might just leave it like that
Sneak Peek:

"I don't like anybody," said XY over mailing on the phone after answering XX's question.
XX stared at the message wondering if she was imagining things just like how she always was.
Repeatedly, she went back and forth from the received and sent messages,
wondering : "did i do something wrong?"
Restraining from crying in the car because her parents were present,
she replied with tears blurring her sight taking some time :
"so what do you want me to do? Continue, or break off?"

-------------------------------------------------------------

A year ago, XY asked the same thing to XX.
XX chose to reply with the latter because she was depriving love from her companion.
XX thought: "I'll be fine after a while, it's okay no?"
Eventually, XX realised that after breaking off with XY,
Girls started to swarm around him, that she was getting terribly jealous as well.
Unable to control anymore, XX searched a way to patch back with XY.
It was successful.

--------------------------------------------------------------

XY replied: " What do you want to do?"
Feeling a tinge of insensitivity from XY,
XX answered to the question
"Let's break"

--------------------------------------------------------------

You know what? i think i'll stop here
I typed until the 2nd saga (ROFL)
But ii thought it was getting obvious.
no cannot. ROFL, because i swore to protect the event of the story from leaking
better stop. xD but well, its' in my draft
try hacking my blogger and you cuold read as well. HAHA!
nights all!

i'll miss you tonight again
i know you wouldn't want me to
i wished that you would miss me as well.

2010-03-27T02:07:00.002+08:00

Eh eh eh
You're going to be gone again
sigh

GUess what?
i had brunch, dinner and supper today
and its all, from the same dishes
sick right?!
But i swear, the soup gets more and more heavenly

I feel so weird today
The so called "EMO" day
I ignored calls (most of them)
felt so bored and time was passing so slow
but when i found a new manga to read
just 13 chapters, i used up like 3 hours of my time
maybe the pages were little longer

I'm missing my darker shade hair
and Im regretting for stopping my hair bleached at this colour
I should have gone for brighter ones to try hehe
I think by the end of the holidays
I;m going to go for professional shop for haircut
get a nice dye and treatment
save it for years LOL

I'm thinking of maybe just dye a lighter brown
(in hopes of getting a nice shade of it to get rid of the yellowish golden)
and curl it? that'll be a new experience. HAHA!
im thinking of getting bangs as well
what do you think? hmm.

I'm back with some blogshoppings
tons of helping ppl to order haha!
fun ah, but i guess im scaring the lady boss
nehh?

Im thinking of going to bugis this sunday
shop for presents. hahaha!
talking about that, i think im forgetting something
better confirm it tomorrow

i think i won't ninja tomorrow
but still, beware of the swinger :)

nights all

-----------------------------------------------
if you hadn't add in the punch line
i would have said i missed you
but all in all, that makes me extra desperate
but well, i won't show it to you
its time to think for you as well
as you always say, its for my own good

x.x

2010-03-26T03:27:00.002+08:00

Stop it

You're trying to do everything to ignite any
possibility for a fight, a quarrel

Anything to keep us away from each other right?

If I'm in your way

Tell me gently

Don't resort to this kind of method

Because it really troubles me

I just want to know how you really feel

Cause, I don't want to mistake anything again

Tell me, what do you want?

Ahh, leave me without regret can?

ROFL!

~

2010-03-25T02:05:00.002+08:00

I feel like staying up late tonight
I don't feel like sleeping actually
I don't think there was so much of an effect from the nap
But yaeh, maybe just update and go and lie on the bed

I saw a person's fb today
Somehow, i was like thinking
Does she deserve to be treated so nicely?
I don't know
But somehow, it seems to me that...
She gotten some retribution. lols =_=
I wonder if thats a good or a bad thing

I feel like staying until 3
but i guess i couldnt
since i need to wake up at 8 to go to the market with mum
so early >.<
and i don't really like markets. LOL
I guess i'm stuck with the "super"market generation ~_~

I keep thinking and thinking
I wonder if this is the correct thing to do
I'm scared of the result
I don't have the confidence to start it
How leh. LOL

--------------------------------------------------------
I didn't suffer a terrible heartbreak
I just couldn't get over with what happened
You just didn't know what i had been through
I feel as if I'm manipulated
And this feeling is coming back
TO you,
**** your life,
You ruined me in a way

---

2010-03-23T23:49:00.002+08:00

You'll be gone if i tell you
I lead a great life right now
I have nothing to worry about
I'm happy

Can i be selfish?

lame

2010-03-23T02:15:00.000+08:00

I wanna say something...
I...

shall tell you tomorrow. LOL!
(gomen, this is an expression of trying to add another post on my blog)

joking~ actualy, its kinda late already
i figured i should sleep since i wasn't feeling well
though i might just stone, but well
see you guys in lalalalalal lolololololo hahahaha
land :D

nights!

p.s: with the lalalala nd the lolololol hahahaha, please check out
COmmunist ROll'd

...

2010-03-21T00:44:00.003+08:00

Why is it so hard to act that you're okay when you're not?

But why is it also hard to act that you're not okay when you are.

You're only there when I'm not okay

You disappear when I'm okay

But can I also assume that I'm only THAT important to you

Or rather, that you think i don't really need you?

Why are you fine without me?

If you don't need me, just let me go gently

Don't go on a sudden boycott

Because its harsh on me

THe long awaited feelings

2010-03-20T23:44:00.002+08:00

Today's plan to go to fareast was cancelled
Poor nonie has fallen sick
While she was sleeping, me and nana had fun
watching AFVs and laughing sadistically
Of course, there were times we "feel the pain"

I'm falling into the deep emo trap again
I hate it badly but its coming to me again
The "other one" that resides within me keep constantly bugging me
My ugly side. haha!

I have ugly thoughts, thats what i feel
I despise that side of me
physically, i can't deny its existence
that's how petty i am.
But i try to keep it away
At least to show the good side to people
But i'm not nicey goody all the time. haha!!

feeling tired, sleeping soon
hope nonie's alright. take care <3

--------------------------------------------
You keep saying that you like the me better last time
Honestly, i hadn't change
The me inside is still the same
Just that, i thought you might like it
So the me outside changed
You failed to notice it
I'm now badly hurt inside

People like me wishes for a time machine
One that will erase all regrets in life
But you know it ain't possible for now at least
The only thing you can do is to repent and try to cover it
But the hole is freaking big
and the repair is too fragile

I laugh, I love, I hope, I try, I hurt, I need, I fear, I cry
All i meant about is one thing
The one thing that kept you confused
The one thing that you never knew
The one thing that i try covering up
The one thing that i'm afraid
The one thing that i hinted to you
The one thing that will co-exist in my dreams
The one thing you avoids
The one thing you're afraid of as well
The one thing that you have no confident about
The one thing you'll never accept about it

Because to you, i've changed
someone you dislike
something you hate
something you'd never expect
I did it all
I tried to leave
But i'm held back by myself
I have to make a choice soon
This is not the reality i wanted

Realisation

2010-03-18T23:15:00.002+08:00

Say, someone just made me realise the change in me
But its not what normally people are
As in example
How a girl revamp themselves after a heartbreak
ever saw that happening before?

No, it did not happened to me
My reason was more stupid and foolish
and.. abnormal

Honestly, I don't feel good about myself now
I really... don't like the colour. haha!
Truthfully, it ain't a colour i wanted at first
I have no reason to console myself by saying its my fault
I feel like bleaching it again, as in to the colour i want
At least an one time thing you see
But my mother is objecting it now
Because she thinks it looks nice on me

If i don't bleach it, then when do i have to wait till?
I don't have much time to play runway
Because time is passing so fast that I'm losing my mind
And then again i want to cut my hair
Like really to find something that suits me
A big change that looks good on you that kind of thing
But i really hate the process of waiting for hair to grow longer again

The other thing, i have a paranoid hairdresser
"Not nice larh" "Not good on you"
those kind of discouraging words,
she doesn't even want to make the risk to try
Also, the "don't regret ah, i tell you le ah"
If it doesn't comes out good, its even more depressing right?
AND.
the hairstyle i want, she never manages to make it for me
maybe she was trying the "something similar"
and just make a little effort to it.

My brother and mother says just go jean yip
Just one time, do a good one on me
hello, i would want it as well
its freaking $200.
EVEN if you're paying for me
I would feel uncomfortable about it as well
Just like how i did my nails.

Someone just mentioned that maybe the person like the black hair me
I just ran through some of my past pictures
don't you agree? I think it still looks nicer. haha!
maybe im just not used to it.
I think i need another few more months to think about what to do with my hair
maybe years
my hair would reach the floor by then
and then its "Dark hair colour life"
Unless i out of nowhere got famous and be a rockstar or a model
play with all sorts of things.
That'll be cool LOL!
but that kind of life won't happen to me
At least i don't think it will. ROFL!

I've got the sudden urge to write a song
I'm so "inspired" by Kana Nishino
But well, it wouldn't last
I think i will just write crap ROFL!
Because details don't work on songs but books
I don't have the patience to write a book
nor enough touchy vocbulary to last my readers
Also, don't you think sometimes songs are so amazing?
i meant the lyrics. Because
Just a few words, it summarizes the start to the ending
i really admire song writers

Maybe i'll blog some shit crap later
but now, i vented everything out
thank god, i didnt cry just now. LOL
nights~

Songs

2010-03-18T20:32:00.002+08:00

Hey! check out the new blog songs i have
the songs are not really new, but i'm having my addiction over it now.
There are like 2 songs on shuffle
Tokutemo & Motto by Kana Nishino
I downloaded all of her albums and singles (i think)
Gonna sink into her world later. tata!
here are the lyrics! agree with me won't you?

Tokutemo ft WISE

Meeting you
is like an irreplaceable treasure
Even if we cant see each other right now
I'll always Love you

" What are you doing right now?"
" Are you really just friends?"
I dislike myself everytime i get worried

You’re working hard in a city far away
Did you change the way you laugh?
As time goes by, the things
I don’t know about you grows

Watching the city waves from the ferris wheel.
The television in front of the main street
Why do I look so cold with out you?

Meeting you
is like an irreplaceable treasure
even if your hearts close to mine
I'll always miss you

I want to see you but i cant
I’ll always be waiting for you
No matter how far we are from each other
I love you

My tears…
Why are they overflowing like this...
Love you so baby

When will the mail come
"I’m busy", the phrase you always say
Am I the only that want to see each other?
I felt like that..

The message I received exactly at 10
You said "Its been half a year since we've been going out <3"
Just three lines and a heart makes me so happy

The big hand that wraps mine
The shy smile of yours, all of them are precious to me
I want to feel you near me

Love, Love, Love, Love, Im in Love
Love, Love, Love, Love, Ahh
Love, Love, Love, Love, Im in love
love with you

Remember when we first met
Memories i made with you
It feels like yesterday
(hey baby)
We took a walk at the park holding hands one for me
Your my girlfriend
I really felt i liked you frozen
Ice cream
As we stare into each others eyes
i see dreams about us
Ah As we talk on the phone
I get sad cause we cant see each other
Gotta Stay strong, My love
I don't want to deal with this pain anymore
But we cant stand to be apart from each other

Meeting you
is like an irreplaceable treasure
Even if we cant see each other right now
Always Love you

Even ordinary words
Become my precious treasures
With just that, I can be strong
So thank you

Forever LOVE
I want to see you, I can’t help missing you
Love you so baby

I’m not myself if it's not you
If it isn't me, you’re not yourself too right?
No matter how far we are apart
I love you

and my fav...
Motto

I want to see you right now
I want to hear more of your voice
Because I think about you so much
I can't help feeling insecure
and I want to ask you again and again
Say, Do you really love me?
I'm just crying cause of you

Hey let's go!
(a)
Say more of your love words
and only let me hear them
Because ambiguous hints no longer enough for me
I want to occupy a bigger space inside your heart
No matter when,
please don't let go of me

Oh...Who are you with??
Where are you??
I can't fall asleep without a response
Your texts, phone calls, and "I want to see you", are always all from me

Just call me back again
I really just want to feel the same as usual
But making fruitless effort by myself seems dumb
I've got that feeling

Repeat (a)

Just a tiny bit more is fine
I want to make sure these feelings
If you pretend like you don't notice,
Give me a sign
there's too much I don't know about my heart
I want more of your love
Please come and see me right now

Oh...We can't meet today either?
Then when can we meet?
You always treat me just like a friend
You never use any emoticons
And I'd only ever get short replies

Just call me back again
Why do you seem to do fine without me?
Say,if this continues on,
maybe it's better if we said goodbye?
I've got that feeling

I want to see you now
I want to hear more of your voice
Because I think about you so much
There's no way for me to just say good bye like this
I really hate myself for this but
I just wanna say "Love you"

Hey let's go!

Repeat (a)

I want to feel you closer to me
I want our feelings to be connected
If I could only be granted one wish
Please don't let go of my heart
I want more and more of your love
Right now, please hold me tightly

Just wanna be with you

Say more of your love words
and only let me hear them
Because ambiguous hints are no longer enough for me
I want to occupy a bigger space inside your heart
No matter when,
please don't let go of me

merry go round

2010-03-17T18:39:00.002+08:00

Birthday's over
18 le
happy days are over
time for more emo hours
do i need any permission from anyone?
no i don't :)

I think that things are pretty messed up this time round
The scar is there, you just can't erase it
And its like the misunderstandings are there
The more you try to clear up, the more it gets worst

Acting all happy, and hyper because its entertaining
But consistently, it shows desperation in it
So much that it gives an opposite effect
Fine, that'll be
I guessed that people would rather see me saddened then happy?
Because they are only there when you are sad
If you're not, byebye and have fun with your life

Contradicting matters,
You feel as if you can't give up
But you feel that you are not fit to be in that position
Then? Make up your mind
Because people are suffering from your inability to decide
But why can't you just give yourself chance?

Hey, did you regret about what you did?
I did. I regretted. I regretted not asking my heart and made that choice
You're being selfish by not holding onto it.
You didn't know how much I went through
You didn't realized the challenges and the obstacles I had
I gritted my teeth and bear through it
I didn't want to make it worse, I talked to others
You said sayonara

Every beings are different in their way
Can't you sense I'm different?
Because I'm different, you're trying to console yourself
that i'm just similar to those people?
They greed over your money
I yearns for something else

It's not that I was being speechless with you
It's that thing you did that made me speechless
I was affected, whether or not you were referring about me
How would i know its not?
A touchy sentence with a sad ending
No matter how i see the front or the back part of it
It's not a thing to be happy about

Hey, you heard that?
There are people out there who thinks i deserve a smile
I deserve better than what you're doing to me
I deserved to be love as well
Stop treating me like an animal or a THING
I have feelings, I express them through actions and words
Just open your eyes and ears, you'll be able to sense them
Because I'm a predictable person

I should stop.
This is switching from 3rd person to 1st person
hehe. ja neh minna san

As time goes by

2010-03-13T00:35:00.002+08:00

I suffer the after effects of reading a manga
which consists of all kinds of emotions
Like how you can find the slightest relation to yourself
I feel for the person inside the story

Not just once, i cried reading mangas
dramas, or sometimes even cartoon =_=
But well, its a good area for emotional output
at least i won't get too moodswing if something happens
Lastly, i will always held a toy near to my chest
so when my heartbeat pass through
i could hear it and i won't feel that lonely

Times like this
really sucks
Honestly, im not looking forward to the big day
i've already given hope for it
you know how some people say
the bigger the hope, the bigger the disappointment?
so its best not to bear any

just a couple of minutes ago
a few people wished me happy birthday
i would have appreciated it if they told me tomorrow
hello. im not yet born on the 13 march...
where have you been reading that from? = =

I got this dress for the wedding dinner
but with my hair, i really don't know how to style it tomorrow
I can't appear dischevelled. >.>
gosh -.-

might upload some pictures tomorrow
i think i might turn in early tonight

Unstable

2010-03-11T23:39:00.002+08:00

I didn't really slept last night
at least thats what i thought
because i kept waking up
and i thought that me and bro was actually meeting mum at 11.30
in the end they changed to 10.30
pulled me up at 10
within 15 min get out of the house -.-

Wanted to go si ma lu to bai bai for bro
since ah ma thought he got affected by "things"
but then today there was alot of aunties at the temple to get ang pao
Don't know for what
so went for lunch and went home le lor

Was tired, so went to nap
woke up and cooked for bro and me
then read manga
Still having the after effects of napping
bad headache

Wanted to shower
dad and mum came back
wanted to shower first
dad was like "people want to shower you want to shower"
"just now why don't shower"
aye -.- why is he getting pissed off for
its not as if i take HOURS to shower ._.

Thats why i don't like how people
getting all high and weird after drinking
their attitude
makes me annoyed and irritated
grr -.-

Goggle Eyes

2010-03-11T00:06:00.002+08:00

I kept bullying myself
I kept hiding about my feelings
I felt that showing it shows a tint of desperation
The kind of desperation that people does not like
I was the guilty being
So this was made for me to suffer
Is that so?

Some people have Goggle Eyes stuck on their eyes
I mean, if you knew that person for ages
you would have been able to recognize that person no?
How they sound like, how they talk how they walk and so on

I saw someone in the shop today
With her parents. and then i was like talking to my mother
"Eh eh xxxx's mum leh"
my mum did not have any reaction, so she just kept quiet
For nuts, the people there were just walking past
and doing their own things
I was so un-noticable?

We actually walked out the store almost the same time
it was hilarious

I just had a feeling, it was on purpose
well, i don't want to be oversensitive or what
but ya. Totally ignored.com.sg

Was on webcam with yiimei just now
She act cute :X HAHA!
*pssst* xD
Nights all (:
-----------------------------------------------------------
I was told not to mind other's business
I was told to be confident about who i am
I was told to be brave about things that will be happening
I was told to act dumb
I was told not to be hopeful
I was told to hold on until something might happen
I was told to give up as well

People hinted me to poke into their business
People hissed and pissed about who i am
People discourage future events
People assumed I knew everything
People add fuel to bad events
People hinted more about the impossible
People increased into matters that was none of their business

night

2010-03-10T00:07:00.002+08:00

I love the night, because it's so quiet and serene

I hate the night, because i'm scared of the dark

Can't i just leave my lights on and sleep?

No i can't. But there's a few solution for me to pass through the night

I need company. I need alcohol. I might need something to drive me asleep

Anything that will stop stimulating my mind to think all sorts of stuff

-------------------------------------------------------------------------
I love to sleep sideways, because its comfortable

I hate to sleep sideways, somehow it activates me to think

I have to lie on my back and stare at the ceiling

It's not comfortable, I don't like facing the ceiling

I feel exposed, uncomfortable

I need lots of things around my head to provide the security

And blankets to keep myself warm

Because when I'm scared, anxious, nervous

I turn cold, and vulnerable

When this kind of things happen, i wish i had a pair of arms

surround me, give me a hug or so

Just like how mum use to get me to sleep on her arms
----------------------------------------------------------

I'm scared trying to fall asleep tonight again

music

2010-03-09T23:57:00.002+08:00

Music is like a therapy
but Music could sometimes make your feelings worst

Just about when i thought i have completely driven my thoughts
away with drowning myself with music
A littlest thing and the coincidental music collided
It felt worst than before

Even know about the feeling of jealousy
Inferiority and the feeling of being incompetent
To add on, you had to even lied and be cheery in the situation
This is bad, real bad
What's gotten into me?

Might say its due to the woman's stuff
But i guess not, its not mood swing
it lasts. like for so long
I'm not handling the situation good this moment
How.

--------------------------------------------------------
You need to possess lots of courage
and lots of confidence
determination
and knowledge to do what you want
and to follow your heart
But what if you're scared
even if you have the determination
and you are sure that you would not be shaken
You don't have courage
no confidence
What will you do?
Will you back out?
Will you come to a decision that may lead to
another regrettable choice in future?

sigh

2010-03-08T18:32:00.002+08:00

Grandma's eye operation was another success
Guess that really means that i'll be alone more often at home
i have been reading mangas i've missed out
and some new ones along
i've on the air con, but im burning inside
like its so hot

Sigh
im troubled by the tiniest thing in the world
even if it could be so insignificant
its bothering me

I wonder sometimes if its because it ain't happening on you
means that you could easily say things as it is
Ignorance is always bliss
The point whereby you don't know or understand a person that well
its the point whereby you know them the best
because when you know them to well
complication comes about
and everything seems as if you do not at all

See thats why recently i don't like staying at home?
because i will think too much
and i'm going nuts
i don't have the energy to create a conversation with anyone
unless they do so

I feel upset and down when im wronged by someone
even if it might be so insignificant
and so tiny
im affected
gnd. ~_~

You are the only exception

2010-03-07T23:50:00.003+08:00

I finally manage to get out of house after the whole matter was settled
but couldn't visit daniel because i thought it was too late le.
so went out to bugis street with nonie instead
just walk around. oh ya, i wanted to get my magazine thats why. haha!

Nothing particular much happened,
went to M.O.F japanese restaurant to eat
SALMON was totally rejuvenating.=D
and the curry craving was caused by the food sampling at cold storage.
hehe.

was walking at bugis village when a stranger sms me
Because i gave my number to a friend yesterday
so i thought it was my friend. This was what happened :
Stranger : Hello!
Me : Jon Lim?
Stranger : who the f*** is jon lim?
Stranger : Are you having an affair?
Me : Who are you?
Stranger : Wait wait i call you
calling......
Stranger : HELLOO!
Me : erm.. hello?
Stranger : WHO ARE YOU (beng tone)
Me : erm.. amanda...
*awkward silence*
Me: Did you get the wrong number? >< Stranger : ya i think so. SORRY AH SORRY AH

Totally hilarious.
the person sounded so BENG!
*giggle*

I finally replaced my broken shades
and continued to walk around until nonie sent me back home
yepp thats about it. nights!
-----------------------------------------------------------

How weird when the person appears offline just to avoid people
and only comes in online when you added some comments on places where the person can see
and then the person comes in and joke with you
give you some life counselling and sort of things
when you're being serious and truthful about the things you meant
the person just jokes it off
Seemingly the person are trying to give up
pityful, angry, sad comments no longer affects the person
even if it did affected, the person no longer cares to cheer you on

So sorry with the playful attitude,
So regretful with the choice
So regretful with the lies said
God would not even present that second chance
Too late
A mean person doesn't deserve to love

I'm out of happy energy

2010-03-07T14:34:00.001+08:00

Honestly to say, i'm kind of afraid
that a certain somebody is out there reading this blog
you'll never know what kind of things they are out to get you
especially a certain reaction that kind of appeals to them
like the "YES she is affected, bitch"
you get what i'm saying?

Seriously, tell me i'm not in this world for SOMEONE ELSE
but sometimes its for me right?
I don't need people in my life who doesn't needs me.
Drill that in my head

i'm really shittingly getting affected for nothing
Argh. Why this point of time man. lols

update later
i'm deciding whether i'll be able to get out of house
i'm in a little mood to spend off my ang paos
or maybe i just want to get out of the house
so i won't think so much
Seriously getting emotional. *knocks head*
later~

Be RIght Back

2010-03-07T02:58:00.002+08:00

You saw this? WELL WELL, congratulations.
I'm currently temporary back for blogging.
just a sudden urge to.
Because i can't really find a place to let loose my thoughts
Wait. DUH -.- im not going to make it obvious
so, give up trying. hahah!!

Recently i have been revamping myself.
Not just appearance wise, but thoughts as well
There seems to have so many things that happen
That my mind alone can't take it
It's another tearful breakdown soon i guess
Especially from something i just saw
Which obviously did not appeal to me

You know what? I've been blaming myself for a lot of things
It includes those which are facts, and those which i think i should be blamed
Don't mind me for being emotional
I really DOES doubt my existence
I know that a lot of people would be urging to kick back those words to myself
But ya. I do have a lot going through my mind
And i just don't seem to know where i can release it

Fact 1: I make random friends sometimes for a reason.
Because they will always be totally unrelated to the things im troubled on
So i felt that i could talk to them
You know, sometimes, things have their reciprocal effect
You say one thing, it gets further, and they might get back to you
The world ain't an easy place, it definitely is not.

Of course, being a natural escapist
I wouldn't want to deny now, because i lives in self denial
I prefer denying things i don't want to see
I prefer messing up with my already bad memory
I prefer creating my own illusions and be delusional
But in the end, those things still gets to be
I'm after all a human, It gets to me
I get affected.

Ending it off,
I, am not the Happy-Go-Lucky person
I, can smile all i want and deny it and hide it
duh, explanations? i love to give, but i hate the consequences
I, can pretend that nothing had happened through my daily lives
But there is always one thing that i can't hide
My Freaking Idiotic Face That Tells You How I Feel
I've tried, i can't hold my emotions off my face
Excitement, Disappointment, Sadness, Or whatsoever
yes, You can see them

Face face face.
Just tear it off me
I'd be better of without it and be a perfect one.
Lols. THere isn't any perfect beings in the world.
Shit Life.

the urge to see you is increasing

2009-09-29T02:24:00.002+08:00

mood swings period came and everything went wrong
quarreled with mum like about 2-3 times for the last few days
all was because of small and stupid reasons
*smack mouth* why would i even talk back to her? >.<

today wanted to go compass for the free dental check
the colgate one. LOL *shows O sign with hand*
but something cropped up, contact lenses were running out
so went to hougang to buy
i got my first pair of coloured contacts!!
and then went back home, whereas mum went ikea with her friend

watch tv all the way with plenty of food
i've been feeding myself alot to atone for the weight
i lost when i was sick
doesn't seem to work much though. LOL

mum resumed her house chores already
but still, she can't manage to take the clothes out and hang
wanted to wash the clothes for her until my holidays end
her hands itchy la, i havent wake up she finish washing le. =.=

and oh yeah. today. and damn irritating guy
keep irritates me with all of his nonsense
come on la. im not tabitha nauser
i know she is 17, i know she is awesome
YOU DON'T HAVE TO TELL ME
and why the crap do you claim you know me alot
NOT AT ALL. >.>...
snsd is selling sex as an individual?
they can't sing yet they are pro singers to you?
come on la. nonsense. GND man >.>

gahh. stupid. just die. LOL
time to read book and night night all =D

everything is trying to tell me not to give up

2009-09-24T01:31:00.003+08:00

If we push aside the blame, for the tears and the pain.
You know love can reign, and the world will smile again.
(remember? the hardest part, we were trying to sing and remember. haha!)

i really did had a very satisfied slumber last night
first time! 9.30 pm. gosh.
woke up a several time in the middle of the night
mostly due to the night chills
so had to cover myself with the blanket

woke up at 6.30am but forced myself back to bed
thinking that i would wake up at 8, i woke at 10. =.=
pig pig pig!!!
nevermind, i felt energy-ful today. haha!

had breakfast and showered before going out
went to plaza singapura today
yepp, my mum was able to move more, so she went with me
bought quite a lot today
from dvd to eating stuff
to accessories, clothings, books
and.. pillow. =.=
the latter was just for collection from seahorse
i swear, its heavy with the box.
i have to carry four, two each hand because mum was
not allowed to carry heavy stuff
hehe. a nice training for my arms? (think hard)

mummy is okay with her recovery
but one thing for sure,
she keeps herself thinking too much
the wind that got into her body during her operation
has caused her gastric pain
she was afraid that it might lead to cancer
sigh. think too much le la. >.<
menopause, menopause... perhaps.

i'm not tired now, yet i want to force myself to sleep
if not, im sure be energy-less tomorrow.
of course, i won't want that.
hunger strikes in now
im also considering whether i should feed myself with food.
sigh.
how i wish i can take warm milk and cookie now
i heard they can help one to sleep well

whatever..
i'll see what i can do. :P
nighty nights all =D

so would it work?

2009-09-19T21:38:00.003+08:00

ok!! i don't have to repeat my same old story everyday..
haha! ok rather, yesterday was exciting (at least)

at first i didn't want to go to the GRC with nonie they all
because i dun wan to leave my mum alone at home.
and also, the rain was so.. heavy :X
but my brother came home, so i selfishly went out.
(in the end, my mother went out. LOL)

ok, so met nonie at city hall
then went to suntec expo hall.
really, u can spot the HS5 booth just at the entrance
then, we went in to say hello to emo_girl and marrku
kerlin was helping there also! (no benefits for her! just helping out.)
ashe was there also :S

saw the dragonica booth, EA games, and all
GOSH the woody was super adorable!
and i wonder whats the challenge about at that booth
what if i can get the soft toy? LOL :X (ok. no more soft toy!!)

went for dinner at some restaurant
the food was super nice
not very ex also
kerlin's friend was soo good to help us to queue. =D

reached home by 12? yepp.
and read princess diaries before i slept.
oh yeah. ten out of ten!!

spoiler alert!!!!!

ohoh. i was reading and all kinds of emotions came out
it begin to make me feel michael was the one for mia
and not J.P. COME ON! :X
then i was so afraid of the ending, so i went to take a peek
seriously, the tensed up me finally got relaxed
at least i know how the ending is..
you know what i mean right?? :P

i don't think much people would be reading princess diaries
ehh. soo not the age already. i think? LOL :X
but its unsuitable for minor!
** sex content **
HAHAHA :X ok la. not much.
more of kissing content :P

and now i;ve finished the book
im so book deprived now.
maybe i'll go to times tomorrow at PS and hunt for books
after all, im a member there .
maybe can go down to suntec to visit them again
LOL :S shun bian ma~~

not meant to be

2009-09-14T23:31:00.002+08:00

i'm so exhausted from doing those house chores
its like.. housewife training from my mum. haha!
anyway, my mum is fine already =D
she's taking out the stitches tomorrow!
and that means.. i have to wake up at 6 am
*GASPS*

from sweeping floor, to washing clothes
cooking, buying things from market/supermarket
hanging clothes, boiling water
everything has their own difficulty
hahaha =X i really think, mothers are really noble

just a few more days. i can do this!
i will! i'll try! i shall! i must. LOL

had a really interesting dream last night
i think its kinda because i was thinking about it lsat night
before i went to the lala land
according to some facts from the dream bible
its kinda true and related to the reality
some of them, still need more decifering i guess

well, more naruto for now!
im re-reading it. hehehe! at 120 chaps le.
shall reach more than 150 before i sleep
and hopefully completes it tmr.

nights all! =D

*self reminder*
phantom : requiem of the phantom
shugo chara
jigoku shoujo

the situation is hopeless now
i can't save that little life now
even if i replace it with another one now
it wouldn't be the same anymore

annyeoung haseyo!

2009-09-10T01:30:00.004+08:00

my KCC cum Ice-Skating friend! so qiao right?!

day 1:
me , kris and xing fen met up at the bus stop and walked to canteen 2
i think we were the first to arrive, since no one who looks like KCC ppl was there
gathered together while everyone arrived and went to a classroom
i was in the yellow grp, kris in blue, and xing fen in green
so we were separated.
apart from that, we made our own friends within the groups :)

first it was ice-breaker games
then it was lunch, and station games
it was very physically and mentally challenging
having the need to even climb all the way up to blk 82 from canteen 2
and then back down to somewhere near there. or something like that.
man, i must have being kind of fit after this camp.

at night it was dinner, then followed by a rest at the loft
some preparation and ideas were made at ning xin's room
then we went for treasure hunting
similarly, we have to climb up and down. HOWEVER
the clues were killing us. hahaha!
we're all like pabo(s) wakling around, going to wrong places.
in the end, we got 3rd in place. heh.

day 2:
the bed was not the same at home (of course)
therefore some aching was involved.
besides, the walking on the first day was killing me legs.
they were aching and breaking if the shoes were not there to support
and guess what? it is the amazing race day on the second day.

IMM was our first stop, but jun was late
so we kind of rested for half an hour there and camwhore.
then our mission is to take picture with passerbys
we were at garden plaza, so we went to take pictures with the kids.
i miss that ang moh child who likes to do the stomp feet move!!!

then it was SP, the mission is to guess the drama/movie our GL was drawing
virgin snow was tough :S
then we went to somerset, our next stop, youth park. skipping rope only.
lastly, it was SIM . so from somerset to SIM, do crossword puzzle.
okok la. at least it didnt need as much walking as the first day

after that we went back to NP library for our last mission
and back to the loft to rehearse our dance
ultraman was easy, just go crazy can le
but naeng myeon was really hard!
learning dance from music core was really hard >.<
and had to teach my members also. well, we managed to pull that off.
dinner was settled at the loft too :D
then we tried out the hanboks for the performance

movie screening was hilarious and nice :D
castaway to the moon? or something like that
it was a total brain wash for the dance
after that was performance, so we have to practice again to drill it in
but still, i forgotten one part of it, so i was standing there like an idiot.
ahahaha! but it was quite neat you know!
we got first place in performance <3 wee :D

day 3:
because of the all-girls party last night
we slept at 3. hahaha.
some others ended the party at 5. wow :X
then this morning is just breakfast and prize giving
we climbed back from 3rd place to 2nd place
with a 8 points different!
however, red group was 5 points more than us. so they were first.
who cares!!! we got first for performance!! (satisfied) HAHA :X

went to meet mum at hougang mall after the camp for lunch
was at popular while waiting for her.
i feel like buying alot of books to read .. HOW!!
and the bibles! as in an "encyclopedia" of tarot, horoscopes, and dreams
were very very interesting :D
and they were quite true you see :S.
but one cost $19.90
sighh >.<''

ok la. after reach home pack bag jiu nap le.
nothing interesting right!

this is a super super long post for 3 days!
i hope it bored you up. LOL
it sure did!
nights all :D
time to manga then sleep <3

Everything must be perfect!

2009-09-06T01:38:00.003+08:00

will heartbreak still happen, if the heart stops beating?

I think it was due to the food for praying
i got food poisoning.
Was feeling okay on thursday night
but on Friday morning, it was a different story

Woke up feeling rather lethargic
i knew that my stomach wasn't feeling quite well
thought it was due to the weather, or not the hunger in the morning
forced myself to brush my teeth, but it was so uncomfortable
i had to squat down and brush them =.=

then went for a shower, half the time was sitting on the toilet bowl
LOL, i shan't explain further
then, breathlessness came in.
i had to keep lying on my bed
even when i knew that i had to go out and meet my mum soon
then, to the point i can't take it, i called to cancel the meeting.
at that point of time, i still think it is due to hunger

i went to make some milo, it was all done in less than 1 minute
all the black out came and i almost scald my hand
then, still feeling bad after milo
die lor. how ?
(touch wood)

then i thought it was stomach flu
until i vomitted after lunch (along with the chinese powdered medicine)
i then knew it was food poisoning
i have no strength to walk about nor eat
everything is ewww >.>
i had bread for dinner that night
and it was at 12 midnight.

all i knew, is i kept sleeping, wake up sleep
nothing but that. anything that could go in was water
i think i didn't had food = no energy
so sleeping helps?
yeah. its almost like ROTTING at home. haha!

today was feeling better
only had brunch = 1 slice pandan cake and bread
then dinner = canned sharkfin (thats the best i can find at home)
and cup noodles (which my parents bought when they reach home at 11)
im sure to have my BMI 15 lost. now, it should be below that.

no matter what, i dun care how allergic i am to milk
im going to feed on milk and cereal every morning from now on
i heard that females over the age of 20 will starts to lose calcium
that they have built up for the past years
thats why ah mas need anlene right?
if i dun consume more calcium products
im sure going to have bones problem when i grew older
hah! thats random, but well, its fact!

if you're wondering why i aren'tasleep now,
my brother is taking up my mattress, my pillow, my blanket
i can't wake him up. how ah? >.<

nights all, =X

i was in pain
my mum asked " then why are you smiling? "
i replied "do you prefer me to cry instead?"

LIES

2009-09-03T23:44:00.002+08:00

how do you make a bitter gourd, smile again?

What if..

-you think you can't trust anybody anymore,
because you think that everyone is covered by lies?

-you have so much to say, but you can't find anyone
appropriate to tell them about it?

-your bestest pal maybe telling lies, to gain some things from you
obviously something only beneficial to them?

-you don't want a person to love you, because it might hurt the friendship?

-you know that a person will get hurt, and you try to avoid it. however the person persist?

-people takes you for granted?

-you are willing to do something to someone, so that that person could hate you?

-you want to take revenge?

these are the somethings i've seen from anime, that i've watched for the past few days
and the last point, from Hell Girl

definitely, its all about taking revenge.
Its the sweetest thing, since its instant.
however, you have to compensate for it,
an equal amount, to be exact.
in that case, do you still want to take revenge?

don't forget, while you take revenge
its something BAD right?
how about retribution?

gah. im talking crap.
just don't mind me. LOL
nights all.

can't get you out of this freaking mind

2009-09-01T23:01:00.003+08:00

i would have wished for the same thing
if only i've known you earlier

how does a "teacher" celebrates her day?

Waking up - at the wrong side of the bed
result = neck sprain-ed

Bathing time - was forced to have an early shower due to lunch, it was so chill-y this morning
result = non-stop sneezing

Lunch time - everywhere also long queue, that doesn't exclude food court
result = gastric (because i didn't had breakfast)

Out-ing - accompanied mother to hospital, didn't went to lisa's dad stall opening
result = mum's report, was not a good news

Reached Home - some weird posture caused a temporary pain around the rib cage area
result = breathing difficulty

Dinner - Macdonalds, fast---- Food :X mummy da bao.
result = couldn't eat properly, because was still in pain

hoho. what a great day. LOL
oh yeah, mummy gotta go for an operation next week
i'll pray for a painless and safe one for her
though the operation was suppose to be this friday, it will be delayed
i'll be alone waiting for her to come out.
how can i pass time when that day comes?

originally, i thought i was holding onto a blooming rose
everyday, it continued to bloom
until one day, i understand that it had a limited time
i realized i was holding onto thorns
and the petals began to wilt

tell me what you feel inside

2009-08-31T22:14:00.003+08:00

woke up as the alarm starts ringing
i reluctantly get up and took an early morning shower
feeling good and refreshing, i head out to the childcare centre to help out
since today is teacher's day

as soon as i reached there
tons of presents were lying around the office
"wow", that was what i was thinking
then i put down my bag and attend to the other children

me and wingsze were helping out at the PN and N groups
as usual, more to the babies of course.
first it was the golf game
its so hilarious how we manipulated the box around to make it
as if they really did it on their own
self satisfactory faces were seen
they were so proud of themselves

after that it was musical chair
then it makes me realised that the PN are more competitive than the N
we actually "fixed" the game result at start
so that the teachers can help "cheat" and make the babies the winner
and i had my forehead carved this word : "VILLIAN"
so bad luh >.<

talking to the K2 during their shower time gave me a dejavu,
as i was helping the K2 when i first went to the childcare
oh yeah, they wore their home clothes today
seeing the girls' dresses, made me feel a tinge of envy
when i was young, i wasn't allowed to wear dresses
or rather, dresses are made to wear on formal occasion
such as wedding, house warming, birthdays
theirs were like, princess-like.
wow :S haha!

present exchanging time
i had never even thought that any of the child there would give me anything
guess what, some of them did
i froze when they said they had something for me
*so touched* haha!
the others were extras :P

i originally planned to go back to my secondary school
however, according to my friends, the teachers were long gone
and the gates were locked. (FAST!!!)
so the time spent on making the ferrero roses
were wasted. to think that i only gave one to my mentor in the childcare
i should have given the rest to them, right?

met with a couple of friends at KFC
had a little reunion with them
chatting along the way as we go home
slacking at the fitness corner
and feel the pitter patter of the rain, when it was drizzling
time sure pass quickly.

after trying to give out the rest of the roses...
i still have eight more. ANYONE? haha!

nights all =D

this temptation i can't resist

2009-08-29T01:28:00.002+08:00

please don't ask me what's going on
because im attempting to forget about it

i've been reading to my past entries
my past diaries
and all i've found something in common.
that common thing has made me think so much
that it caused emotions over flowing

im sorry to edmond, who tried to invite me back to school
for a reunion with the other phss-rians
but i didn't went, it was because i was feeling so wrong and bad
and i didn't want to let you see my past self
after you've actually witness me being cheerful and happy
which is a fraud, i have to say.

i couldn't lift myself out from this unhappiness im experiencing today
i've been lying today, a lot.
i wrote inside my diaries, as usual when i don't blog
and writing couldn't help anymore
i burst out , cried and cried until my eyes were red and swollen
i forgot about my dinner
i forgot about my shower

i was needing a soul to talk to badly
sadly to say, i couldn't be bothered to talk to anyone
and neither anyone talked to me
all i can do, is keep reading ____ ________
until i feel comfort.

i went to shower, and continue crying
i stopped now. i don't know if it'll continue further

i curse my dreams
i curse you!
for making things that's impossible possible
and when i woke up and its reality
i wanted to sleep forever now
at least i'll be happier like that.
sigh. spare me.

nights all

he said something, but you're not the "he".

2009-08-22T22:51:00.004+08:00

<>

heh. i actually fell asleep without taking off
my contact lenses last night
lucky i woke up at 6am (which is a Saturday today >.<)
to take it off and woke up later at 10am.

manage to catch at least PRMF last epi.
then walked to the 89 bus stop to wait for vivian
heh sorry girl. i was really bored :X
thats why i keep taking your picture. HAHA xD

reached simei and waited for the lady boss to collect the spree clothes -collected- and went to the shopping mall nearby to makan then we went to the pet safari before we went back home eheheheh! *drools* at all the doggies xD
the pomenarians are uber cute and the chihuahua!!!
then saw black winter breed hamster
i miss my shadow ): ~~

went to the vending machine to get drinks for vivian
and the vending machine was actually a little mad -.-
cannot press all the "A"
then wanted to get F&N orange instead,
green tea came out. LOL
worst of all, the hole where the drinks are dispensed
you can't even take the bottle out.
and some inconsiderate ppl actually threw rubbish inside..
EWW >.<

this person pops me an msn and ask if i was okay
this person "sense" i was feeling not okay
thanks for the effort, but it actually made me not okay after that. sigh.

sigh. time for more manga-ing :D
then sleep time. xD
nights all!

this time, you're not the one who told me that
sigh.

im deprived from the ambivalent

2009-08-21T18:30:00.003+08:00

ahahah, the very old one. sec 2?
yeah. my mum wants me to chop my hair off.
cuz i've been dropping lots of them >.<''
hmmm. i should consider this length back!
but.. i'll need 2 years to grow back to my current length. LOL

woo! finished one exam, one more to go.
i realised a couple of mistakes from the paper i did.
careless ones, sigh.
and i have no idea why i wrote Mary Ainsworth instead of B.F.Skinner.
Babinski was a total shocker also. all the others i remember,
the most unique one i forgot. lols~~

i was so so so delighted when i can leave the exam hall
and blow my nose. LOL
i was refraining from doing that loud disgusting sound in the quiet room.
though, its not as loud as the thunder just now. haha!

argh. i should stop the complains
not gonna care about it anyway, its OVER!
soo time to concentrate on PPCM instead.
gonna print out all the things tonight so i can study. heh

just now, when i went to the music shop,
i realised these 6 guys (i think) were doing that irritating sucking sound
i turned over and kind of remember one of them.
for the 15 minutes or more i was in the music shop
they keep constantly going over to the glass cabinet and look into the shop
"Very pretty hor!" (in chinese)
haha. ya right.
at first i thought they were talking about the drum set,
ain't so. -_-

then when i went out, they lined up near the escalator
and did that irritating sound again
followed me to 2nd level think i dunno
pai seh lor. i think you guys look like sec 1 or sec 2 to me
go home and watch your super yoyo. shoo =.=
teens nowadays. *tsk, tsk*

okay, time to slack a little,
or maybe a little nap.
whatever. finally can take the flu medicine tonight
wee :D ~~

Chionging for studies!!!

2009-08-21T01:18:00.003+08:00

i've been tempted to put this up because, i like the alignment of the trading cards!
heh. thanks vivi :D

its 1.15am now. and im blogging. haha!

a breather from studies is definitely needed.
i just need to look through the chapters in the textbook
and go for my beauty sleep.
i'll wake up earlier in the morning to confirm and memorise whatever i written in my notebook.
to think that "thick" exercise book, i just occupied 1/4 of it.

i love copying things because it actually helps me to memorise.
however, it hurts my finger, ALOT.
bad writing posture and pen-holding to start with
reminder : must check children's writing posture. (its good for them >.<)

just now, mum came in to "accompany" me,
ended up sleeping on my bed.
worst of all, snoring. LOL.
and my dad's legendary motor-bike + fountain actually made it worst.
heh, what can i do? :S
oh yeah, that reminds me. the breathing thing they sell in watson
it does not work on my family. LOL

7th month story ~~
yesterday was the start of ghost festival.
maybe i WAS paranoid, i felt very very nausea and wanted to vomit.
i've no idea why that happens when i was going to sleep.
*think about the story my mum told me about her friend's father)
maybe something stomp-ed on my stomach. LOL
okay im joking. *choy choy*

then after praying all sorts of things today
i wasn't having the bad feeling as i did for the past years
i hope everything will be fine though. heh ;)

okay the end, time to revise and sleep!

woo so scary

2009-08-20T00:02:00.003+08:00

lols~ taking picture in the girls toilet. heh :X

IM GOING COUNTRY!

heh. yeah. change blog song.
they had been around for quite sometime.
well. nothing to put so just change them. lols :X

oh yeah. Ghost festival has started!
so lemon is going to get very very supersticious
and very very paranoid.
heh. actually its a pretty good time to see me getting freaked out.

yesterday was terrible.
because bro's gf came quite late,
the whole signing thing actually ended at 1.30am
well, my medicine has lost its effect
i actually was sleeping in the living room with mum
but couldnt. woke up at 4am
read doraemon then slept at 5am. LOL.

there you go, i woke up after that at 11.30am. =.=
but at least i got to revise some of my notes

SELF REMINDER : CHECK EXAM VENUE AND TIME

heh. so tmr gonna chiong studies
hopefully by then, this freaking nose will stop leaking.

i've noticed that my hair loss rate is going higher
its scary enough to see the amount of hair strands on the floor
*freaked out* do i have to seek a doctor for that now? :S

well. im going to read some manga until the medicine kick in
hopefully not too late
i don't want the hungry ghosts to mistake me as food. LOL :X
sleeping that much really makes me an insomniac
its like how the song fireflies by owl city
Why do I tire of counting sheep?
When I'm far to tired to fall asleep
(i was actually counting sheeps ytd. it didnt work ): )

i guess i had been dreaming all along O.o

fireflies

2009-08-18T23:21:00.003+08:00

seee! outing leh! still pin up until my forehead so clean. LOL :X

yeah. theres probably nothing much to blog about today.
except going to the doctor and getting more pills >.<
then now im kinda whining to people that my brother gf haven come
and i cannot sleep because, we're helping her to do some insurance stuff i need to sign.
arghh. the medicine is so strong >.<

okay. im going to post something here.
so people interested just look at this section.
heh. i actually took it from the i-weekly.
translate it cuz i think chinese characters wil be small.
okay here we go :D

okay basically, there will be parts of people that are born on the days in the month.
so just refer to it. my language is not perfect,
but just hope u can understand :D
oh yeah lastly, this is for friendship. heh :D

one more thinggg!! they may not be accurate ah!
some needs to be jumble up a little. after all,
all human beings are unique and special in their own ways :D ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- People born on 1,10,19,28
in most situation, if you have a friend that is born under these days, its best if you let them do the decision making or to lead you. they have requests as if they are the royalties, no matter what, you HAVE TO listen to them. If you offended them, even if you make the first move to apologize to them it may not work. The best way is to let them calm down first and decide whether they want to forgive you. but when you need help, they will act as if they are the big boss and guide you.

People born on 2,11,20,29
The people born under these days are the emotional types. At times when you need help, they will give you the support and the encouragements, but they do have some serious mood swings.(they can change their mood really fast) If you want to be friends with them, you have to understand this point. When they are grumbling about certain things to you, at least act as if you are listening (even if you really don't care, or don't feel like), because, all they hope from you is to get a similar response to what they are grumbling about.

People born on 3,12,21,30
Capable of making the atmosphere more lively, people born under these days are suitable to do work related to public relations. Places with them will be full of live! These people loves the live and the crowds so they will be more used to group activities, only a small percentage of them will try to exclude themselves in those one-on-one or small group activities. They are very creative, try including them in planning events or activities, it may make that event more fun and exciting.

People born on 4,13,22,30
They are the typical "LAW BY LAW" friends, in reality they could make you feel rather bored,( well, if you don't understand what they are talking about) but when it comes to planning and grouping stuff, they could actually do a great help! If you keep stepping on their tails and not let go (getting on their nerves or whatsoever), they will be the ones to bite you back! this actually also act as a reminder for you that when you make friends, you have to give the other party respect.

People born on 5,14,23
With endless charms, they often are the focus in the public. Without them, sometimes the atmosphere will seem a little down. They love to talk, to the point that sometimes they will tell you about stories of themselves or what they have experienced. Therefore, with them, you don't have to worry about times where you have nothing to talk about. But they have their stubborn side, they may do things in a way that will be more advantageous to them. Unless you have the confidence , don't even think about having them to listen to you.

People born on 6,15,24
They are like angels with wings, that will take care of you have protect you. Although their personality are sort of easy-going, they don't easily join in people's gossip. When you have problems, they can help you to solve your worries. On the other side, they do have habits of coming late, it could be due to having too many "small problems" to do before coming on time, so don't give high hopes on them coming early.

People born on 7,16,25
In all of the birthdays, people born under these days are kind of the hardest to make friends. Because they are used to hiding their feelings to the point that you could be wondering if you have the rights to call yourself their friend. But once you become a friend that knows them a lot, they as the "strategy commander" armed with loads of plans and strategies will help you to get over with your problems. If your friend is born on these days, why not spend more time understanding them, you might end up with loads of surprises!

People born on 8,17,26
The people born under these days likes to do things according to their way. Being their friends you have to be more patient. They are always teaching you how to relax and enjoy life, how to be hardworking, how to improve yourself, but among all these things, they could be the ones that they'll never try or have done before. They like to show off their "powers" so just let them say what they feel inside. It may really benefit you in the work you're doing, if not they being "isolated" may leave the group and be gone for good.

People born on 9,18,27
The people born under these days are considered as the really considerate ones, who'll always think for you. the only flaw they have is that they are very emotional. So during conversations, be careful not to offend them or they may get really angry with you! However, if you know how to get along with them, they are friends with benefits.

im like a sick bird waiting for you

2009-08-17T23:58:00.003+08:00

you must be wondering.. why the old photos?!
well, last week, i happen to "GOP" some pictures from vivian
and found out some pictures that i had never seen before.
from nice to ugly. LOL
and while looking at the picture i realise 2 things

1) last time i very guai. in school go out, hair also clip until forehead is CLEAN. and the amount of clips.. i shan't say further. LOL
2) now i understand why i had heard ppl who said that i look old. HAHA. well. you have to wait for the picture to be posted. then i can explain. :P

heh. i think my love for shaker fries had gone a little overboard
seriously, though i am beginning to hate french fries these days
im willing to eat three times a day, because of the shaker.
:P well, you don't see it in mcdonalds everyday.

With a little LJS, sore throat came after that.
when sore throat comes, my nose will not spare me either.
well, i guess late showering and drying hair in front of the fan
did make it worst. :X

so i've been slacking for these few days
while some of my friends might be studying.
great great.
i can be sure that if im not starting soon,
my CD will be a confirm fly away
(of course, i won't fail that module either -.-)

more sleep, more medication, and more rest!
that'll be whats going on for today
and MAYBE tomorrow.
i really want to start studying soon.

ok. good timing.
the medicine is kicking in.
time to sleep and sweat more. :D
nights all!

每天, 有多少人和你擦肩而过, 又有多少人走进你的心里

lovely

2009-08-14T23:37:00.003+08:00

those happy days, sec 1, STILL playing eagle catch chicken. LOL.
find me!! :X

after all the things has been settled
PBL2 and the make up attachment
i went back home with my tired brain and hungry stomach.

Laid on the couch after my dinner and watched Super Yo Yo.
felt asleep and off-ed the tv .
throughout the 7 hours on the couch
with waking up a few times
i had the most irritating dream that night.
although it was just a part of it.

woke up at 1.30 after i felt someone carried me into my room
it was my brother.
heh. no skill, carry until my bones were hurting.
then i was woke up.
2-6am i never slept. until 6.30 after i tried to wake my brother
i slept again.
because during 2-6am i was re-reading fairytail
then i dreamt of the virgin. heh.
dug a hole and pulled me in. wow.

well, thats the story for yesterday.
today was okay.
a relaxed day. bought some nicelooking and useless things
hah. dun care la. im sure its use wil come in handy someday
ok. going to have my seaweed fest before i sleep.
nights all ;D

smiles, and hopefully it'll pass by ,

2009-07-23T00:46:00.003+08:00

im backkk~
well, i can see that the work load is coming
and that the exams are coming as well.
i just can't make myself focus and finish all the work in one day
and the 2 make up session for sports and wellness occupies my time
its so retarded.

Speech training for story telling will be next week
2-3 minutes in the limelight plus 25 pairs of eyes
is enough to freak me out.
now im wondering. how am i going to boost up my confidence in one week
if only they were children. i wouldn't mind that much ><

2 more essays which needs about 1000+ words each has to be done over the weekend
IT information & PBL with dreamweaver and photoshop needed.
FP booklet and 2 more weeks whereby the exams are coming.
omg. this is overwhelming. lols ><

nonetheless. im still going to have my breather for tmr
the days where i can see the children and smile
because they are so cute and innocent
(well! im not going to add that work has to be done while observing them!)
and the yoga lesson. OHMMMMMMMM~

lately, friends around me have been writing songs
english chinese, you name it.
it kind of sparked my interest to do one as well
though the story is thought of, my language is still a problem here.
i don't think i should think about it la. LOL

chiong chiong chiong for 3-4 more weeks
then holidays are coming.
mugging session for IT is needed le. LOL
nights all!

----------------------------------------
i know its late! but its better than never!
the translation for the emo blog song. LOL
ok la. not that. i just happen to miss this song
and movie a lot :S enjoy!

i feel the wind blow in this place
there i see the star beyond this window pane
shining so bright
here in this night
here i feel the sense of love
deep in my heart
i cry for you
every tear that falls feels like a wound
the stars in the sky
gently shine
taking away my pain

i hear a voice gently saying
don't be afraid
i feel the warmth come over me
as i sleep in their embrace

and even though i..

do not have the strength to go on
even though i try to hold on
this love will never ever be meant for me
but i'll keep on smiling
even though my dreams won't come true
i'll remember every moment with you
like the stars that shines forever
i'll treasure my love
for you

the heartache lives on inside

2009-07-09T00:00:00.002+08:00

tmr its attachment again
i miss the children so much since i didnt went last week
so much things had happened in these few weeks
that i've lost count of it.

i can't care about myself for these days and weeks
since my mother hadn't been well.
admitting hospital every few days
how scary is that?

Again im with stressing myself so much
i give myself so much expectations when i dunno why
when i can't fulfill it, it depresses me
Also, im beginning to unable to differentiate dreams and reality
seriously it sucks

the same person every night appears
ends with a silence too
the unrealistic dreams in the past
is coming close to the realistic world
everything seems so real

oh yeah anyway
li ping's song is really nice
im really commenting it you know!
and you made me think about the lyrics so much.
i frightened you when i sang out a verse of yours, didn't i? :P

tomorrow, no matter what,
the project HAS to be done.
friday will be the presentation
and i'll be finally free from this words from hell - PBL
and two more makeup lessons for sports and wellness.
seriously, u dun nid a full 100% to pass, isn't it? ==

sigh. whatever. have a good night rest to all (:

its over and done

2009-07-07T21:44:00.002+08:00

haha im back from a long break from blog.
basically, just pure laziness thats stopping me from blogging.

same as yesterday, didnt went to school
missed child D module for 2 lessons again. aye>.<
went to the doctor this morning,
the clinic assistant said i had to wait for an hour or two.
so went back home and went to the doctor in the afternoon again.

THIS IS WHY i HATE RELIEF DOCTORS.
they are so inflexible and so not professional.
anyhow ask you few questions
prescribe medicine and you can go le.
i wanted an MC for yesterday and today
he said cannot yesterday
then a letter? he said cannot. ahh. whats with his cannot -.-

theres a new blog song now though
well, its not really NEW.
its from 200 pounds beauty. (long ago one somemore)
oww. i miss hanna and her sarang (dog).

hahas. well, im going back school tmr!
anyway, CONGRATS TO GENA (:
you got into the finals for robotics.
*clap claps :D*

night all!

nuuuuuu!

2009-06-21T00:03:00.002+08:00

so today was 4e1 class bbq
its a relieve that many turned up
except the sad thing is that not all turned up

all along i thought it was at punggol park
and then, a phonecall to people tells me its at pasir ris
great. so WHERE is it?

then called some people up to meet and go together
well. at least when there are people that will get lost with you
you're not being alone. haha

went to downtowneast, then cheers to find the other classmates
while they went to buy ice
then the walking journey was like.. 30-45 min
i swear, i should have gained alot of muscles today. LOL
and the ants! i got bitten up like 4-5 times. ew.
those areas are still itching though.

today me being the "bad" person
stand by the pit help ppl fan the charcoal
the fact is, im GOP-ing food when its ready. LOL
yum yum :D

so after that went off with gena
lols. i swear, we're like scaring ourselves when we walked out
seriously, it was dark, and quiet.
and it even sound like in higurashi
the cicidars are crying. LOL

ok la. eventually got out lor.
then went home.
supper was bak goot soup
it made me like super impressed wsith old people's cooking
i must learn from them one day! wahaha

ok sleeping le! tmr shall do some work
night night~

if the mind takes over my body
and they moves by its own
the plan shall be carried out
earlier than planned

dun know la!

2009-06-20T00:47:00.002+08:00

giddy spells for two days straight.
NOT GOOD.

well. i HAVE to mention this.
i dreamt of ms. GANUSH yesterday night.
NOT GOOD.
LOL. damn scary la.
imagine when u see this freaking scary old lady
when you look into the mirror.
and "it" hinted you to go blk3 jalan basar road.
does this place even exist?

dreams are so unpredictable.
and its so interesting how the brain really works.
isn't it?

well. today is not very good day
the blood isn't flowing to the head
perhaps i've been talking without thinking
spouting nonsense and whatsoever.

and NOW! bed time :D
nights all ;)

perhaps i should stop going
and stop reading
its bad for health.

GOSHH

2009-06-19T01:30:00.001+08:00

yupp. so i've no idea how today is passing so fast.
and holidays are feeling as if its over.
though i still have like a week or so.

and finally, the psp MS is reformatted
here comes GAMES! but too bad
the bitorrent is making me vomit blood.

Until death do us part is a nice manga
*smiles* but with more blood. LOL
but im immune le la.
to people who watched higurashi=.=

im regretting something so badly that im feeling giddy
shit -.- shouldnt have read that
aye. whatever. it should be better after a sleep
nights all ~

I WANNA CHIONG ALL THE WORK.
BUT ONLY SECOND WEEK CAN START.
SADDDD ):

my way of caring

2009-06-16T23:22:00.005+08:00

12 more days of holidays!
guess it feels as if it'll soon be over
yet it felt unreal! lols

well, today went to simei mrt to get clothes ordered from blogshop
the other spree are still taking a long time, so.. only got to get one today
then went to loyang tua pek gong to pray
@ smokes: ew. :X

went for lunch at the nearby coffee shop
had some food and went home
then, i have no idea how i spent the time from just now till now
lols -.-

i think i have been breaking my record
going out everyday, thats really not me. haha!
im usually considered to be a lazy one.
now i really feel tired out.

i've been playing guitar for a while
and i still cant freaking play F!
*faints* somehow, it doesnt fit into the songs either.
whichever have that F. hahaha
and i went to try the song which my bro's gf say its easy.
just suddenly, the lyrics was meaningful (:
maybe because... i never really went to read it last time la! LOL

寂寞开在心事旁 Loneliness, I place next to my heart

随手种一些伤感 Plant a little sadness over it

不让星星来窥探 Even the stars will not get to spy on it

找个沉默的夜晚 A dark silent night I seek

不让星星来窥探 Even the stars will not get to spy on it

随手种一些伤感 Plant a little sadness over it

寂寞开在心事旁 Loneliness, I place next to my heart

我的关怀方式 My way of caring is concealed

是你无法察觉的悲凉 in cold sadness you cannot sense

只能在你不经意时 Only when you are not knowing

才锁上我心房 it gets locked into my heart

你往常的亲切友善 Your endless warm concern and friendliness

是我今生的遗憾 is my helpless regret in this life

受伤后无悔的埋在 When hurt, my pain I bury with no regret,

不流露的脸上 it will not show on my face

thats all folks! nights :D

sarcastic, cant hear that?

2009-06-15T00:49:00.003+08:00

i've messed up!
so its today father's day?
or next week?
people are celebrating next week.
yet my calendar says its todayO.o
whatever.

today went to POMO again!
the same place where my fam celebrated mother's day
except we ate at different place.
at JU JU. lazy post pictures. haha

dad was like mountain tortoise.
jiu ceng ta was something bitter, yet he thought it was seaweed
he went "ah man, bu chi zi cai? *takes big scoop* *put in rice* *eats* *PUI!*"
so hilarious :D
and the purple guitar i saw.. damn! so tempting. haha!
someone was at the jamming studio there oso. haha

went back home, completed taken and twilight
then went out for dinner with brother
well, the "PLAY" dvd rental wasnt working?
then we went hougang mall then causeway.
ya, the problem is, u have to return the same place you rent.
stupid right? unless you subscript la.

so reached home at 11.
tired tired. haha.
talked to vivian and still talking! LOL
ok. going to sleep soon :D
nights all :)

im mad, cant you sense it?
im full of sarcasm, cant you hear it?
im hating how its unbalanced, cant you stop it?
ya, insensitive as always.
thats why you never succeeds in certain things.
yes. you get on my nerves.

NOOOO!

2009-06-12T15:24:00.002+08:00

its a nasty feeling for the start of the holiday..
i went to the salon with a happy mood
and met up with my mum at the usual place.
i didn't want to cut my fringe at start even when it grew long.
i thought, during holidays, then cut.

then my mum suggested me to cut. ok lor.
then my mum went away to dunno where.
without her supervision. SHE starts to snips the hair.
"how do you want to cut your fringe?"
"oh, like the last time, but cut to the sides more.. and the length above eyes can le"
*snips.... above eyebrow*
*shocked*
"ermm.. i said, above eye.. >.<"
*brings down more fringe, snip snip to cover.*
"wa, lucky i pin up the half of the fringe"
*sads**STARES*
"er, i want to cut more to the side leh"
"but hor! later cut le very flat, like not nice le! cannot see the slant."
"but nevermind de ma, like that tie hair will look better, the sides not that empty"
"aiyo, nevermind de wad. bu hui nan kan de la"

ok. i dun care even if you have been my hairdresser since i was born.
but isn't it that CUSTOMERS are ALWAYS RIGHT?
i TRUST MYSELF that i have BETTER FASHION SENSE than YOU.
and that u snipped my fringe, i didnt even COMPLAIN?
it looks damn ugly with the short in the inside, and long in the outside
clearly the outside fringe cant cover the inside ones.
and the middle area? looks like some kid who accidentally snipped away the side part, without cutting away the middle area.

damn sian liao. especially when you know that FRINGES cant be EXTENDED.
p.s: im not trying to be fashionable or what..
this always happens whenever if the hairdresser is feeling damn frustrated
or damn busy. then my hair will take all the frustration. good lor.
it totally spoilt my mood.

what a great start for a break.
oh ya. brother is back from europe tonight.
here comes my punching bag.
simply great. ._.

i'll feel lucky if im with you everyday

2009-06-07T22:33:00.003+08:00

u look at the mirror, the reflection is.. LOL

yeahh. i'll blog before i sleeps!
nope, im not going to sleep now,
i wanna study!
finish reading le.. now is! *drum rolls*
notes writing! haha

basically what happened today is just normal.
and im "so proud" of myself not eating lunch
admit it. u woke up, lunch is a stupid maggi porridge.
for me, its stinks now. idk why i like it last time.

then read read.
until around evening vivian came to be the loan shark :X
then helped me buy dinner..
thanks girl!
i made sure we had the 二人世界le. hahaha!

after that, spamming facebook quiz.
pure randomness. just a breather from work.
and the doll quiz. damn freaky la!
i thought chucky was gonna pop out.
if so, i'll scream like hell and admit to the hospital. LOL :X
then no needgo quiz-ing tmr at sch. lala :X

today right! eyes still twiched.
but not that jia lat le.
but then. my left start twitching.. LOL
irritating la!

ok, time to colour-fied my words in the brain
and burn all the oil in the midnight.
nights all :D

begging you mercy

2009-06-07T00:36:00.003+08:00

wellll. PBL is totally PAWNED finally!
haha! next is the Wricom PBL....
equally bad. haha :X
there goes my hols. lala

im struggling between getting birthday presents for this 2 ppl
-one who owes me but im deciding to give that person
-one whom i owe to, and im deciding to give as well.
*laughs* i've totally no idea how much they cost
and i was supposed to be able to get one of them today.
guess what, my taka/KLP(kallang leisure park) trip gone,
so, its a nono for both. haha

bad thing first:
my eyes have been twitching for like 3 days
and what i;ve seen:
-2 accidents i saw, at the same place. (that place is CURSED)
-(but hear la)tears, not from me, duh -.-
-misunderstandings happening
-me getting blue-blacks everywhere
-whats next? haha

good thing!:
holidays are coming!!!
cheerrrr!!
and after quiz on monday, it'll be free time! no IT lesson
and oral on wed. soo... how do you pronounce... DRAGONITUS?

ok. i was feeling so damn bored after sim-ming
so.. i was zilian-ing abit. LOL.
got the idea from the evil twin concept. haha!

don't you just love the retarded spec face? LOL.

missing you too much??

2009-06-04T00:47:00.004+08:00

I am so glad that IT's PBL is finally finished
but im left with student reflection and report
that's tedious work, i'll leave it to tmr :X

PBL presentation was ok o.o
i was satisfied by my team's presentation(:
except i should've gotten myself calmer
my heart was beating like crazy during presentation
and again with the (i dunno wad i was talking about) sickness.
LOL -> i wonder how i can overcome that.
stage fright. tsk tsk.

tomorrow's gonna be attachment!
shall nap after that and continue on the PBL.
compiling work is left for me after all.

over the weekends, im so gonna study
for the quiz and PPCM(i think got)
lastly, the ORAL thingy for STB. aye
after next week.. HOLIDAYS!
come come, come to me faster. haha!

and my brother is coming back soon
i wonders what he bought for me.
he said i'll like it. lalala.
but when he comes back.
i wun have peace! LOL.
(lemme enjoy first. the peacee!)

and holidays!
im so gonna GROOM MY ROOM :D
i got the idea in mind.
i want to do alot of things to my room..
hopefully, the result will be *thumbs up* :D

at least hitman reborn is interesting now..
the first 40 chapters was ackkk :X
i love lamba! when he's quiet. LOL
the noisy lamba is so annoying.
and the grown up lamba is... ermm. (no comments)

fighting efforts for tmr!
chiong ar!! :D
here's me and vivian chan!
slacking and snapping pictures at ourspace yesterday
let's have another 二人世界 someday again! hehe!

a rose a day, means that i missed you a day

2009-05-31T23:31:00.003+08:00

curses with the PBL.
so many problems coming up.
i was ALMOST done with the access.
until i accidentally off-ed the program because i was
handling with too much explorers to help me finsih ..
in the end, i close the program without saving
there goes my day.

hopefully for tomorrow's KCC i'll be attending only the language lesson
i dun wanna watch the movie.
first: i've seen the trailers and watch part of it
second: i wan to do my access, just in case i not enough time.
i wan holidays ): fast fast fast T_T.
and i think i need to go for a check again, sigh.

today, again, i witness how another adult could cry
because of the L.O.V.E.
and how a "child" like me can help to console and calm her.
truly it leads me thinking whether i will become like that
in the future.

lols. ok. i better go bed bed.
tomorrow. long day.
HOLIDAY COUNTDOWN: 14 days!

i change my blog song again! LOL
ok, im watching a korean drama
cinderella man now.
so im hooked to this song.
you know how korean drama works
the OST can play 5-6 times in an episode! LOL

Death. its a word to be hated?

2009-05-31T01:26:00.003+08:00

well, today is same as every saturday
at least i made myself rested the whole day
as to rewarding myself for working hard for the past week :D
it was really tiring -_-
enough rest, tomorrow shall continue with my PBL
a non-examinable module giving so much trouble.. geez

i think today's meal was a little.. TOO scary
ordered pizza, mum still cook. >.<>.<>.>
definitely, im getting more emotional nowadays.

ok, gotta go sleep.
charge all the energy to complete the LAST work. :D
FIGHTING!!

p.s: im not trying to be momo (: lalala!

Human life is like a tube of toothpaste
We use it up to the last bit for sure
That's human life

wth.

2009-05-30T02:00:00.003+08:00

suddenly, the words of the fortune teller came true
i would like to believe he was lying instead

joke la! i feel kind of sad now because of something
and that something is coming true
then i feel like crying after listening a song
held it though.

if she was a baby, i would've held her and pacify her.
calm her down and make sure she gets a good rest
but what if its the other way round?
i feel so much pain when she's crying
and that she doesn't know that she is.

sigh

2009-05-28T22:53:00.002+08:00

im so going to die.
i dislike the weather nowdays so much!
isn't it getting too too hot?!

i woke up, feeling as if i never on the fan
and went to childcare for attachment
im insomnia! can't sleep totally.
therefore waking up with a headache.

when i reached the childcare, it slowly turns from a headache to dizziness
hopefully, i did get something inside my brain.
i keep hearing myself talking.

swallowed some blood circulation pills and slept
didn't nap much cause it was too hot.
i never knew my first alarm could wake me up.
been lying in the bed for a long time.

stupid dizziness. now i realise.. excel and access not done.
tomorrow need pass up.
if group blog takes long tomorrow...
can i even finish them?
geez. im so dead.

am i the kiseki?

2009-05-26T23:00:00.001+08:00

a fun day, and its tiring too!
reached childcare by 8.30, to go botanic garden with them
help them tie their tags and play with the pre-nursery kids :D
ashton pointed at me and called me car car >.<''
and "pu-pu-pu-pu-pu" can make him laugh. LOL. so adorable :X

basically, we're suppose to observe the children's milestones
it was hard, since they were all indulging their conversation
and i feel that it was rushing for the schedule.
seeing how they can run non-stop,
even after playing and climbing stairs at the tree house.
sweating like as if they were drenched in the rain...
but they were still energetic..
looking at them.. "sigh, im old already. LOL"

apart from walking the whole morning,
yoga was in the afternoon, quite sad.
i wanted to go home straight ):
and i forgotten about yoga pants..
so i was.. stretching in jeans. >.<
worst thing is, i have no idea why it seems to be more
determination testing than usual. haha!
and yes, i took painkiller. :X

i got pictures taken from the botanic trip.
but i think i can only safe keep for my own.. purpose.
im not a pedo. thanks -_-
well. own reference for FP. sooo. it'll be nice :D

im itching all over as well.
something i came across in jabobs ballas children garden
made me itch the whole day..
just hope these red patches will be gone tmr. :D
and im gonna finish ST, ITA, and FP stuff tmr..
CHIONG AR!! :D

daa daa daa

2009-05-26T00:05:00.001+08:00

somethings seems wrong and not in place.

love is invisible

2009-05-25T00:50:00.003+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JIEYI :D
stay pretty always~ <3

let's start the post with a normal sunday
bad blood circulation spoils it all
what worsen it was...: another spoilt gadget.

nothing wrong with the memory stick...
just.. the PSP itself.
ever gotten so unlucky that, you spent the whole day
downloading a new game , ended up getting you hook after trying
and the next time you play, it shows
there are no games.

and normally, even when there are no games inside,
the psp itself will put loads from crap there.
today, its just THAT sentence.
things like that just always happen to the almighty trouble-magnet
yes, thats me.
basically, all the sadness are gathered in me.
(and apart from that, lunch makes me even sadder.
dad never fails to buy cai fan that makes me feel like (BLEH) )

skipping the sad thing, i passed vivian the blogshop money le.
i'll never have to go shopping for months (i guess)
lalala. and i got baby plants from bugis yesterday..
small organic plant, in an transparent capsule.
too bad the colour of my cactus went... very light >.<>

stupid for you

2009-05-22T23:19:00.002+08:00

and finally. weekends.
can finally sleep later tomorrow, after such an hectic week.
attachments was great yesterday :D
suzanne is so cute while eating! and ashton, sleeping with his car car.
gosh, so adorable. HAHA :X

today was having only PPCM, then went back to compass to find my mother
since she wanted to have seafood before checking up
(just in case, her report is bad, and she cant eat anymore)
so we chose.. the almighty SUSHI! <3

i told my mother i was going to write an essay on what happened.
but, guess not. HAHA.
its was so embarassing and hilarious.
we just ordered what we ate everytime, with one more dish
the unagi. you know on the menu, they have like 3 pairs of small pieces
and guess what when i ordered?
the whole piece of unagi spread on the table......
its like, so HUGE and DISGUSTING just my LOOKING and SMELLING it.
i swear that time, it tasted bad.
i swear... im not going to eat anymore unagi for a long while T.T...

after that i went back to nap.
zzz. nice sleep :D. though only for 1 hour, i was satisfied.
i was feeling so blur when i was in compass. everything i said and do
was not going right. like a corpse walking, or someone sleep-walking.

i was surprised that when my mother woke me the first time
i was awake.. normally, i'll just ignore the noise and continues. haha!
and prepared for ice skating and went out for dinner

today ice-skating was ... SUCCESSFUL!
at least i improved my falling rate from 10++ to 3!
and.. another big incident when i was afraid of bumping someone
and fall backwards.. but i was lying forward when all the ruckus was over.
how did someone lie forward, when i fell backwards? i guess i just FLIPPED.
i heard there was someone who jumped over me too. dang-_-''

1) i learnt to skate at an appropriate pace
2)i managed to turn to the direction i want!
3) i learnt T-break. (tea-break. LOL)

wee. haha :D okok. gotta shower and slack and supper.
no more tea breaks. LOL. nights all :D

p.s the pictures for the unagi.. i'll post later. LOL

a chocolate a day, keeps the frowning away (:

blow wind blow

2009-05-18T18:07:00.003+08:00

guess what wind is blowing me to blog today?
haha. i guess i managed to vent out my frustrations.
its normal for me to be stress, but abnormal to be THAT stress.
seriously. try to understand me and be in my shoes.
i can't be the one who's always be the nice and goody one.
compromising all the decisions.

i rushed like an insane woman during the 3 hour break to finish the newsletter
i neglected lunch(not really, i had hotdog bun only)
and i still feel like throwing out, even there's nothing in me.
well. bad night, so bad health. haha

i felt like a gorilla or so during IT lessons.
(i want to hit my chest and go ohhh eee ohhh eee ohhh!)
i feel so damn frustrated by MS access.
people who are good in them, please help me. haha :X

i gave up and will do on access.
people who are reading this. dun complain when work comes tough
after i take MY CHOICE ok.
its kinda forced also.
p.s: if you dun understand this part, just ignore me.

i went to 7-11 after i reached sengkang
bought ferrero rondrior, which maybe able to help me release myself
in the end, confiding my mother was what i felt like doing.
im sorry for being a bad girl to make you worry,
yet, thanks for listening to me.
i think her presence is the only thing that can make me show my true feeling.
i vented out my frustrations, my anger, my grievance
with something i hate doing.
because i'll feel like a spoilt kid if i do that.
at least, i feel i grew up a little.
just because i dun whine with it now.

i hope, i can really sit down and settle what i want to.
just hope nothing will goes wrong.
since fate,chance,luck has failed to give me the 10/10 i wanted,
i hope at least 9/10 will be with me tomorrow.

and yoga lessons, that i can stretch myself
and kill all the dead cells in my brain to relax
hopefully, WRICOM wouldnt murder me first.
bye all (:

I NEED A BREAK.
p.s to people who tagged me! i saw them!
but i dunno what to reply. hehe :X
sorry for not replying! :D

im dying oh oh oh!

2009-05-17T23:02:00.003+08:00

BEWARE: ferocious lemon alert.

i feel so screwed up right now.
and feel so damn irritated when i can't make myself do work
when i finally get motivated to do something
in the mid of it, i suddenly mind blank and forget what i must do
so after that spending like hours just to click and click for nothing

i wanted to do work seriously la.
and people keep asking questions.
please la. listen to classes and ME. so i can save the time and trouble man.
how would you feel if someone keep asking you the same question?
and.. even if THIS PERSON HERE DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING
i still try to find out right? TRIAL AND ERROR PEOPLE!
i don't have a hallucination or a DEITY to answer my questions.

this is why i hate letting people know my blog URL.
things you wanna say you cant say.
since im being the NICE LADY to stop myself from being TWO-FACED.
i think i should stop putting my butt and nose into business and let people
do the TEDIOUS JOBS and get ugly red marks on my assignments.
cool right?

well. im done gathering information on the newsletter.
now left with combining my info and joy's info and put it nicely.
500 words essay, i think it'll be ok for me.
since, im a "rapper" with a "C".
lastly PBL. i hope my inner self won't jump out and bite people tmr
im feeling so so tired yet i don't dare to sleep
for people who know me, you'll know that i do what im told
and i FINISHES my homework cuz im afraid of the TEACHERS.
thats why, i just have the feeling i haven't finish something
well well guess what?
i think my stress level just went up to the red zone. ha-ha.

my blog i think it wouldnt be that active until i finish the assignments
this is the crucial week. since next week is e-learning week
dunnid to go school.
but it means, OPEN YOUR EARS AND TAKEOUT A NOTEBOOK
to write down whatever is needed to look out for so ppl will stop asking
stupid questions.

one more month to holidays. damn. i need them badly now.
lols. and i freaking need to study cuz exam week is coming.
how can someone miss that much because of a stupid illness.
sad.

for this instant. i want to be a magician.
disappearing acts are my favourite

mother's day

2009-05-10T21:14:00.016+08:00

I LOVE YOU
MUMMY (thats what i learnt from the childcare. HAHA)
pictures speaks itself.. with a little help of comments...
let's go!

menu at tao's restaurant (POMO)

the table! :D

played diner dash? when customer not happy, u serve special drinks :D

1st dish = appetizers - prawnroll and pork floss(left), fruits salad(right)

2nd dish = soup - sharkfin melon herbal soup. (highly recommended :D)

3rd dish = mushroom sauteed (not taken:X)

4th dish = main entree - tao's chicken(left) , grilled lamb blah blah(middle), grilled snapper with japanese sauce (right)

5th dish = dessert - chocolate fondue(left) , poached pear(right)

6th dish = drinks - rosemarry apple tea(sweet), summer peach tea(sour), grape mallow's tea(just nice)

those highlighted in red are what i ate. lala
3 person, good services, good food. less than $100. hmm.
is that expensive? :X (not i pay anyway, my brother used his "money" to pay)

ok. sad. tmr have classes. going off now. nights all :D
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY again :D

im back!

2009-05-09T23:54:00.002+08:00

ok. panic panic.
for not blogging since awhile, i actually almost forgot about my blog pwd
hahaha :X

anyways. i think i've been too tired out to blog
i feel like a pregnant woman who gave birth
and have been having something for a whole month.
i think its better to check it with a doctor >.<

well, let's recall thursday, when i had my attachments
seriously, when i just reached there, the first thing i wanted to do
was to scream and hug the kids. guess not. haha!
had a tour around the childcare and proceed to taking care of them
the sad thing was, i was wearing white. and we had a/c..
red paint! on my pants and top. sad case. LOL
i was like, ok ok , no cry :D can wash off de. (i mean, i said to the kid)
well, i couldnt wash it off after i get home.
my lecturer joked about having me to dye my whole pants red -_-.
haha. funny =.=

then, there was another amanda in the K2 class
kids are so easily entertained.
the whole "joke" about having two amandas,
the kid and me, lasted the whole day...
i think it was kinda awkward for the xiao-amanda.

and and.. ASHTON IS SO ADORABLE!
after we had cooking lesson, i followed ashton to the toilet
to wash his hands.
he cannot reach for the tap, so have to help him. haha
then we ran back to the cooking table.. and i get to carry him off!
awws :D

friday!
ice skating. fun and terrible
a beginner who fell over ten times since the ice wasnt resurface
and those seniors, who created tons of ice shavings on the ground
the ice melted, causing it to be.. WET.
when i finally leaving.. they resurface the ice. sheesh =.=

ok. i was badly injured from it.
firstly, EVEN WHEN i hadnt reach the ice rink, i fell -.-
because of the steps.. i didnt notice..
from the third row, i stepped onto the second one..
so.. i got a scratched on the small thigh, and a swollen big thigh.

ok. at first, it was due to a lose shoe, since it wasnt tight
i fell because of that. and.. being a beginner, without a female senior is hard
the male senior will not really help you much. >.>
oh ya. and a friend of mine who called me to chase up
i hurt my left wrist because of the fell. the speed.
and actually, the wrist hurts because of muscle ache
my VEINS were the ones that went swollen.
now it look like pig's leg -_-

from yesterday till today
i keep sleeping. i wasted so much time
to.. SLEEP. lols >.<
and PEOPLE, its mother's day today!
comeon, celebrate with your mum!
do a card! give her a treat!
a present? or simply a hug!
HAHA, guess what.. i learn that frmo the computer lesson at the childcare.
muaha :X okok. im giving my mum a treat at tao's restaurant.
check the later blog. i think i'll capture some pictures :D
nights all <3

anyway. i change my hairstyle..
i cut a slant bangs.. and my mum says i look like a jap girl.
is tat a good thing or a bad thing? -.-

happy birthday daniel~!

2009-05-03T23:06:00.002+08:00

since im online, might as well blog, lols!
well today woke up at 11.30 in a shock
since i wanted to leave home at 11.30 actually. LOL

so went out at about 12 to get asyraf and daniel's birthday present.
then about 1 mrt to jurong. whoa. 1hour journey.. then reached at 2
met daniel at popular at the interchange to get his "board game"
but in the end got uno stacko. and california girls~ HAHAHA :X

ok, i passed the bouquet to daniel on the bus. LOL.
that flowers, made me so embarass in the mrt. SEE LA DANIEL! . :X
aye. then me first one reach his house. at 2++ i think
bony (?) was cute :D and EHH. im not molesting it la! lols :D

then eiv came next, asyraf, then jing teck
ate abit first then jieyi came. dexter came last o.o.
play around~ and lipstick on my face as forfeit.
eee. lucky the facial wash can remove like the colour.
but my face itches because of that. HAHA :X

went IMM since eiv want cut hair, dexter shun bian collect specs
then were slacking around at sky garden...
went back to dan's house to cut cake and watch X-men
damn.. i ewant watch finish! LOL. nvm.. i left at 8.40?
thank you eiv for bringing me to the bus stop. ghahaha :D

i keep sitting at the wrong side of the bus..
cannot see thomson plaza then alight.
lucky i rmb the row of houses.. then sat 163 back.
when reach home was like. 10++ O_O.
showered and preparing to sleep!
tmr still got lesson >.<

shall eat supper and then sleep, night all :D
and and happy birthday daniel! :D

sad

2009-04-30T23:35:00.003+08:00

stupid internet. when i need you, you just have to breakdown. -_-.
and you signed in yourself when i was watching the television
and missed something important.. internet, YOU GOOD. ROAR.

anyways. today no lessons, since is attachment day.
well, there'll be attachment next week, cant wait. whee~
i was supposed to go back to school at 6 today for a briefing
my mood just went so damn bad suddenly
and i wasnt feeling that good.
oh ya, after the briefing i was supposed to go for ice skating trial. sad cannot go.
my head still hurts when i bend down.
the blood rush to the head, and it hurts(?). aye -_-

actually, theres a reason to my bad mood.
many many mistakes that i realised i made
many many regrets.
i hate myself for making them,
i hate it even more when i fail to realise them.
see the big word there? HATE
i stared at that particular thing for so long..
i had to keep myself under a cold shower for a long time just to cool myself down
despite of my ongoing flu.
honestly, im still thinking over it.

well. i can really do nothing
the only method i had to resort is something i dislike to do, but too bad
and the other mistake that led to this, dates back to january.
the sentence that i wanted to say so much here,
or anywhere people can see, i refused to. nyah nyah nyah nyah.~

i really felt like crying it out today
but tears cant really solve the problem
and especially when i wanted to, i couldnt do it since i didnt want
a particular one at home to worry over it.
and now, tears are filling up my whole body
and i cant release it.

-sigh-

whatever. i'll be fine after a sleep
blah blah blah. i feel so lifeless.

and those lessons i missed for the past two days
i felt that i couldnt catch up much.
partly it was because, i probably was the only few who actually listens in class.
sitting at the back, you witness everything
and there was so much distractions over at the back.
and once again, over another incident that happened
i feel like a god again.
i just couldnt understand why i was the only one who was able to answer to all queries.

and gosh. somebody said i was crazy for studying in library...
but that was because, i reached school too FREAKING EARLY
sadly, that was only for once. since yesterday i was too busy settling some people's work
when they just don't answer their calls from the school. simply great.
i feel like staying in the library and catch up the IT and john santrock.
with finishing up the research work for 5/6 years old ...

oh yeah, for some reason, i got a new nickname.
panda. -_-. when everyone looks like panda to me, i was called one.
great. im the HMS mascot huh .. that makes me the god. lol.
(and please, sense my SARCASM )

ok.. i think i'll head to bed now. nights~

why lost

2009-04-26T23:31:00.002+08:00

i hadnt been answering calls, smsing or replying much to ppl's msn
becuz of the stupid sickness i have.
fever,flu, cough, sore throat and stomachache. LOL
seriously, doesnt it sounds too drama? :X

actually friday, i was having a dry cough
i thought it was because of the dust on the clothes i tried
well.. it was a symptom telling me that, hey! its time to get sick!
i felt a little sad because despite complaining the itch on the throat
to my mum, she did nothing la.
well, she did said she rather see me as a healthy person
then a weakly being. LOL. denial only :X

the fever starts coming and i had been feeding on synflex not knowing
it wasnt the fever medicine.
and worst of all, i was allergic to synflex. LOL
so from 1 pill, i increased my pills to 4? about there. lols
cough, (synflex), flu and stomach.
cant do anything about the scratchy throat. lol

and then this afternoon i was wondering how come my fever not going down
and desperately trying to get myself warm and hot
until i finally broke a sweat! :D
then my mother woke me up and told me off for eating the wrong medicine
i dunno why... but i wasnt feeling good this morning..
my lower body to my legs were numb that i couldnt walk properly.
then i stepped on the ants insecticides.. then she scolded me..
"how come u all like leg no feeling de ar? !@#$@$%"
ehh. u were right. my leg no feeling. LOL

then i was having breakfast, biscuit and tea..
similarly, my hands no strength.. so i spilled the tea.
"eat biscuit, crumps of table, drink tea oso can spill.. @#$#$^#"
aye. ur daughter not feeling well, save the reprimands -_-
then scolded for the medicine later on. LOL.

and.. surprisingly, seed of chucky weren't too scary for me.
i wanted to watch the show, and napped from 9.15 to 10.
but the medicine was going. (stupid synflex actually)
so i slept at 10.15. then woke up at 11 cuz the phlegm of choking me
went to pee, then saw chucky on tv. i wasnt scared!
as eiv said.. i cheated. LOL i wasnt wearing specs after all :P
and i thought the child of chucky was cute! :X
and te bride was like a blythe.
anyway, was too sick to care about what scares me the most.
i felt like on the verge of dying. LOL

sooo. i feel better, i wonder how im going to survive tmr.
from 7am to 8.30pm. im going to stay in school until that late
i'll be like half-dead by then. LOL >.>
and my assignment for the 5/6 year old kids research still havent do.
-sigh- works are piling up! roar! :X
i think i better go sleep le. lols
sigh sigh! tmr still have to see samantha choo T_T.

tata ppl :D and.... not forgetting.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASYRAF :D !!!

one week passes. 2 days of silence

2009-04-24T23:53:00.002+08:00

well! as usual, the early morning...
then reach there at 8.08. today dunno why so early. LOL
then went to outside the room to wait.. saw firdaus.
i was like. whoa. the early ppl yo!

my cheating in powerpoint was impressive to alot of ppl. LOL
obviously they didnt thought of that way..
i guess my slides are harder to summarize.. lala

anyway, classroom management was fun..
we played with the mini drums and acted like the baracudas. LOL
jokeee. some reflection then go home liao..

talked to joy so much for the first time while going home
then reached hougang mall to get my injection.
i wanted to get it tmr cuz i thought the whole project meet up
will end late.. but only shimin hadnt added the pictures.
so we were fast =E!

i dunno wad happened.. i think it was due to the curry puff
and the dust on the shirts.. while i was trying them before the
clinic had their lunch break..
i got a dry cough. sad sad. LOL

the injection was ok today..
no tears. nothing. LOL. just frown :x
he pinched my flesh and poke the needle today!
which hurts lesser! he he should have did that 1 month ago.
one more needle to go.. at september.
i guess when the last one comes. i get immune to it le. LOL

went home and watched identity..
then had a nap from 4 plus.
was reluctant to wake up cuz i dreamt of school. LOL
bababa. :X then 8+ wake up and made instant porridge.

had a bit of slight fever going on and the stupid cough.
oh yeah. i finished the white swan and the moon.
OI DANIEL. STOP LAUGHING! LOL. :X

okie dokies. i cant meet vivian and shimin and gena tmr
saturaday is my ah ma house day.
next time k? bye all :D
nightss~~~

(shit. i cant shower with hot water. SAD -_-. )

third day of the poly life!

2009-04-22T23:33:00.002+08:00

i wonder anybody is experiencing crazy howling wind this moment
my neighbours flowerpots are toppled. LOL

aye anyway! today woke up at same timing
had lesson at 10 but reached school at 8. LOL
so went to the library and study alone
damn shiok seh. LOL

had speech training at the start,
it was quite fun, and it'll definitely be able to train my confidence in speaking up
i kinda dislike it when 25 pairs of eyes are staring at you...
when you speak. and its like.
(heart *thump thump*)
LOL. ok.. so i have a new program for recording which is super good. LOL
*smiles*

after that the break was super short
1 hour isnt enough to find a decent place to eat
but luckily the next venue was near.
had IT lesson. ok.. boring!
everything in the notes were like summarized from index
like. super slacked work from the lecturer.
she give me the bo chap look. LOL :X

group work assignment to be handed up on friday
i guess i will do the slides later (3 only ma! but summarized from like 20 slides!)
then do the animations tomorrow, hopefully today
assignment leh! cannot anyhow :X

attachments on week 3!
but alot more to do. haha. FIGHTING! :)
yawn yawn. nap for like 1hr + then wake up and had dinner
i feel lazy settling dinner after classes.
its like. the bags are crazily heavy
just the laptop is enough to injure my shoulders.
i think im getting IMMUNE to the pain -_-

tmr will be super sad since week 3 then got attachments
no classes, but need to cheer for the Dance4FUND
aye. i wonder why is it compulsory for our class to go.
actually only needed 20 ppl. but 4 are dancers so the others
have to go and cheer. if i can choose... i rather not go
aye. T-05 are super enthu ppl! so no rebellions please! haha :D

anyway. i'll go do my work le.
i wonder why only IT got so many work -.-
aye. over weekends need to do SOMETHING
and the research for child's PIES. haha

well nights all (:

second day of school!

2009-04-21T23:33:00.002+08:00

WOW. i feel so proud of myself for doing the assignment
when i heard many were stuck in the middle. LOL
i feel so tired from doing it too.. haha!
never underestimate the wonders of powerpoint
thats will be the lesson learnt.. during the work process:D

well. today was as usual, eunos mrt..
but it was packed like siao >.<
everyone crushed me like roti prata. lols
tahan until outram park station then was more empty
i missed 3 opportunities to grab a seat. lols
and my shoulder blades were hurtinglike never before.
stupid bag >.<

reach school and slowly walked to makan place
sat at the chair there waiting until the time comes
well... actually was supposed to meet my classmates at 8.40
but.. i really don't recognised them after the first day. so never join.
after that went up to the class with shimin and joy
then went to the lecture room for written communication

something i really am afraid of.. ESSAYS
*faints* lols >.<
aye. but first lesson still quite fun
i know, the scary things will start coming next week.. haha!
lucky written communication one week 2 hour only :D

after the name game, we knew everyone basically
call me the unlucky one for being the last one
i memorised everyone's name. LOL
so went to tutorial.. and today..
we played children's game. LOL
from paper ball, 5 stones, rubber bands, top
you name it, we played it :D
then analyzing about the toys,and recommendations to be made
talking about that. i better type the info down when i have time.
and print! (of course O.O)
hurrays to next week no tutorialfor tuesday.
but group work.. (dang dang dang!)
aye. just enjoy can le :D

i was glad that my class all enthu people
all went to collect T-shirt
all went to eat together...
all went to cca fiesta..
all went to the sports briefing.
i chose yoga for sports and wellness. LOL

and the most amazing thing is..
the instructor in charge of yoga.
is SO COINCIDENTALLY.. my P6 tuition teacher.
LOL >.<. from english and science teacher
becomes yoga? o.o...
then everyone was like so shock
"huh? a male for yoga"
oh ya.. he will be the ONLY male in the class. LOL

went for software installation after that.
then the uncle again.. like going to scold me like that.
so hilarious. LOL.
he let me off, and asked me to joined the queue
if only vacancies were available, i would have..
gone after 30 minutes.
so wait like 30 min...
install for 1 hour +.
the lady uninstalled my mcafee and office
and re-install to confirm i got everything
so.. my laptop is good as new? lols!

had dinner then did the powerpoint. waha
ppl are still struggling while i sleep!
enjoy! HAHA :X
ok gotta go. nights!
tmr still nid go early even if class starts at 10
go school read textbook luh :(
i bet no one have read them..
then tmr group work. DIE lor -.-

ok. nights all :D

first day of poly

2009-04-20T21:30:00.002+08:00

a new chapter unfolds*
today was the first day of poly.
well for people who happens to live near the school
they can sleep late. for the unlucky people like me
HAH! just like secondary school life. too bad :X

so due to THAT stupid reason
my dad was sending me to school as usual
hey hey! its not lucky or wad.
its not to my school, its to eunos mrt only
well. sad case. i really hope to bus there instead

for some reason, the car sickness was super bad for me
then at the platform, i was waiting for the train
came le, wanted to go in. guess wad?
some foreign indian workers chiong in and occupied
a whole lot of space and time.
and were adjusting their bags and stuff
when i wanted to go in, the door was like closing
they still gave me that LOOK. like " why dun wan come in?"
HELLO. u wan me die before i get to school? HUH!

so took the next train instead.
even on mrt, i feel so bad, i could throw up.
and the laptop was so heavy, no seats was available anyway..
until outram i sat down.
so trained until clementi then bus-ed to NP.

was waiting for barry and people at the bus stop
until like nearly 9 O.o
then i went to lecture theatre.
guess wad! i saw SI JIA. OMG!
she was like sitting beside me! so COINCIDENT! :D
ahhhhhhhh! sorry :X i just love her too much. LOL

the introduction to the course was ok la
at least i could listen to it :D
and copying notes.. i like! haha :D
just kind of like normal miss krishnan type of class
during remedials... copying~ hahaha!

ok, then during the breaks
we went for the cca fiesta. walk walk round
im tempted to join NRA hiphop. but i saw something..
AUDITION. LOL. no way man.. >.<
i went to korean cultural club.
and they were cutting the red F4 card. LOL
ok. anyway. i went to support fiona.
i didnt mind, to get thrown in cheerleading. LOL
and dance sports. which is like international dance
ok la:D i like. XD

so went to makan place to eat.
like koufu luh. then everyone went off
fly my kite! hoi! lols
went to join JOY at the library then walk to block 53
for the IT lesson.
the place was hard to find itself
especially it was kind of hard to find in NP.

guess wad we learn? window vista, powerpoint..
still got homework. lols .... aye.
then after that went for software updates
since i wasnt able to use the wireless throughout the whole lesson
so.. i went there, and there wasnt any "spaces" for HMS students
so gotta go tmr.
sports & wellness t-shirt were unable to be claim...
and the prestige card ran out.
so that means, its the same old thing tmr. sad.

basically, im tired/ lazy to do the powerpoint thing
and i wonder why i seemed like the god..
everyone keep asking me how to do..
what to do...
need to bring anot..
AYE. i dunno la :X

so now, gotta charge everything!
then check mel
then pack pack
then sleep. LOL :D
i need energy badly

nights all :D

hiding inside the sheep skin

2009-04-19T00:40:00.002+08:00

new fb pic! i love playing with the effects <3

whats up peeps! haha
i never knew that spongebob squarepants
had such a huge impact on me!
for the sake of it, and the look of the time
i sprang up from the bed and ran to the tv and watched
waha! during the commercial then brush teeth :D

had pizza hut delivery for lunch
reason: no one actually are hardworking enough
to get out of the house and buy lunch..
if i were to count, i didnt talk over 50 sentence today
i didnt talked much the whole day. and i regretted -
for not being the person to order the delivery

1) i hate pineapples on pizza. LOL im not a pineapple lover :X
2) mayo kills my stomach >.>
3) seafood supreme is a scam for pizza hut. chicken supreme is better :D
4) capsicum on pizza won't leave its smell on the pizza. LOL
thats why chicken is better!
5) i hate the new crust that according to the other two person who liked the crust
it tasted like biscuit to them. nahh. it doesnt taste like that

being females are sad because when THAT comes,
you will get mood swings easily
especially for me, im a professional swinger
my brother actually black face-d a couple of times
because i was MOST OF THE TIME ignoring him today
sorry uh. no mood. thats all :X
the cramps just killed lots of my cells already

read Sket Dance today.
surprisingly, its quite nice. hehe
occasionally, it had its funny part. <3~
had to bathe, then went out to grandma house

and again, while buying some snacks at ESSO
the cashier lady asked me whether i had pumped my car fuel
umm excuse me? im that old?
and.. AUNTY this is the second time le HOR!
jeez >.>

for the first time today
i ate faster than my father during dinner time.
and i started later than him. LOL
i guessed lunch didnt do its job to fill my hunger
was feeling so tired and fell asleep while watching "love"
but i knew, what was showing, since its half consciously.

i finally cut my toe nail, which i dislike doing that..
when it grows later, it'll poke my flesh which makes it
hard and difficult for me to walk. ahh.. must cut, so tahan ba
for somer reason, i buffed my finger and toe nail until it looks super healthy
and.. i buffed my mom's. LOL.
i had no idea why i did that. lala

i gotta sleep soon.
i need to adjust myself to an early sleeping slot
so that i would adapt when school starts.
just 1 more day! school will start.
tomorrow must sleep earlier, cuz it'll be a long day
especially.. something will exhaust my energy even more.

i need to make more american ginseng tea
when the school starts. LOL :S
welll, tata :D

shopping spree!!!!

2009-04-17T23:18:00.002+08:00

i slept at 3.42 last night. LOL
cuz of beloved PAN-KUN!!=D
i was sharing with my brother. haha :D

i woke up at 10+ today.
had a cup of milo as breakfast and shower
then went out in a rush. haha

so bus-ed 80 to bugis.
found a place to settle for lunch and ate fulfilling :D
then began the shopping!
at least i got the 2 pants i need
and a pair of shoes.
the others are tops? and mother's items

it was a terrible shopping today
since i picked the wrong timing
big aunty's visit... haha!
and i actually survived today!
wow! ahaha :D
and the shoes i wore was killing me.
my mother's shoe was killing her.
so we did constantly exchanging of shoes. HAHA
its a good thing things can be shared within us :D
and my mum was actually flying to the sky
when someone said she is my sister..

came back and ate dinner at 5.
damn early. LOL.
thats why im so so so hungry.
i need grocering again.
its too bad my house are full of hungry ghosts. LOL

well. wadever.
my lower part of body aches like dunno wad.
ahh. well. good night! LOL

thank god. i tot i was going to cry again :X

2009-04-17T01:07:00.003+08:00

i told you! i really have nothing today! haha
nvm. today woke up at 12 +
i was amazed that even with the 3 hour nap
i could still fall asleep rather fast
THAT makes one tired and sleep easily.
waha. dun think of anything horny :X

bro wanted to call for delivery
lucky got call mum, she bought lunch already
after lunch BFF all e way until last episode
i meant boys before flowers. so much flaws la! LOL
from just one episode, i picked up 4 mistakes from ji hoo
1st: he cant harmonica.. -.- he pout his lips and went back and forth.. -.-
2nd: he cant piano! his hands were playing chords. BUT. the music was piano in mp3. LOL
3rd: car wash... how the hell would bubbles be floating around!
wont water from the hose burst everything? tsk tsk.
4th: LASTLY. most ridiculous one. how can ji hoo's childhood bagpack be..
power rangers.. and is recently shown one? =.=
haha. ji hoo in the show is 20++. 15 years before was? THE OLD POWER RANGERS. waha.
and the best ones though X:

i cant stand so much crying in the show for the last few epi.
u noe me -.- cant stop the water tap. HAHA :X
and thanks daniel for listening to my grandma story :D
and PLEASE dun use that nickname for that person>.<'''
*cough*

apology to someone :X i dint hear my phone sms.
and i have no idea how someone with 800 free sms
complain heart pain, 800 sms only. erm.
its a HUGE amount for me since... i dun sms, when no one sms me. HAH :X
and the other thing is.. i always disappear ^_^".......

aye. just now was strumming some tunes with my bro.
LOL. i actually envy him for being able to press te chords.
lala. i dun have strength in my delicate fingers. LOL :X
*envying him able to do almost everything*
*if only he wasnt a lazy person, he can do anything*
:X~

i guess imma go sleep le.
tmr must wake up early and go out
waha. shopping day O.O.. actually need to find something la :D
ok goodnights~!

whether the weather be fine
or whether the weather be not
while whether the weather
whatever the weather
whether we like it or not :O

ottoke...

2009-04-16T00:39:00.002+08:00

and yes! something to post! lols
soo today woke up at 7 and prepared.
had Mcdonald for breakfast but it was too cheesy
ate abit and throw away le.
left at 9 and travelled.

slept like 1 or 2++ ytd becuz of someone -.-
then when trying to keep awake in mrt was tough
especially the entertainment i brought, wasnt
entertaining enuff to make me feel awake.
i cant understand a single thing inside the book. LOL
sleepy~

so reached clementi mrt station and bus to ngee ann
unfortunately. i alight at the wrong bus stop
and it was like one bus stop away.
wanted to walk but rain so heavily
i will get wet even if i open the umbrella..
oh ya. my mini purple umbrella is officially spoilt. LOL
after the sentosa thing O.O.

so bus like one stop to poly..
the bus driver dint notice i wanted to board.
he accidentally open the front door and i chiong up.
LOL. u should have seen his reaction.
*hands on chest, pat pat pat*
so, im a ghost that appears on rainy days uh.. LOL

was still quite early when reached there.
lucky the ppl who went camp was waiting there le
went to find wingsze then waited for the whole thing to start
it was rather boring.. u noe. intro intro.
motivational speech.. lalala. all sorts of clubs.
listen from left ear, right ear out nia.
tired luh.

had lunch at 1. buffet woo!
made some new friends there. LOL. intro here and there la.
then went back to listen the diploma talk
sad, monday then can collect t-shirt
cuz.. no size le. LOL! S too big la. must get XS or XXS :X

went back home by 151.
wanted to sleep but dun dare.
LOL. my eyes were like so dry the contacts could
fall out any moment.. O_O.
mrt home then bought somethings from cold storage
stock up~ lol >.>
its sad to be someone who eats alot. waha

reach home bathe-d then nap
cannot hear alarm then overslept. lol -.-
ahh. shall continue boys before flowers.
one more epi then sleep le.

nights all :D

tell me what to do ):

u really.. not talking to me? >.<

2009-04-14T21:53:00.002+08:00

bah bah!
woke up at 9 today. breakfast then go out
went funan with mother to buy lappie case
ate at foodcourt then go bridge road...

wanted to find something. erhem:X
then cannot find, so walk walk.
then go chinatown walk lor.
walk until like 3++ went to buy teabreak
taxi home cuz things were heavy
bought books from times for uncle mah

so went home ate teabreak
shower-ed second time cuz was sweating too much
then relax lor. LOL
bought the crystal puzzle from times.
hard to piece ah. but figured out how to do.. LOL
then complete.. (although with alot of misharp in between)
haha=x

oh ya. tmr must wake up early
nid go ngee ann for something
then also get the sports awareness tee.
free marh. LOL
sad sad. go and return trip 2 hours. LOL.
lala. bored D;

and oh yah. go off le :D
nights all! ;)